Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Rob the Bus
When I was young I used to blat down motorways at 80-90 without a second thought. I used to speed. I used to chance it and drink three pints and then drive.

But now, I never go above 65 on a motorway, I generally always stick to the limit and I ***never*** drink and drive - not even a glass of wine.

HOWEVER - I find now that if I've been on a long motorway journey, I arrive fresh and alert because I've not been looking for Pc Plod all the time in my rear view mirror. I come home from work persecution-complex free as I *know* that I've not triggered any speed cameras. And I can drive everywhere knowing that if our local constabulary do pull me, then it's for a damned good reason.

Actually, this getting older and driving sensibly malarkey is quite good, isn't it?

I'm actually quite happy to turn into my Dad. For those of you that know him, you'll know that it's no bad thing (God bless his poly-cottom socks).

Why do people still drive like ace-holes? I watch them shoot past me on motorways and think 'Your blood pressure must be through the roof mate'. This is probably a little idealistic but we all need to eat some frood food and become a little hoopier.

Cheers
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Well, it would take quite a bit of medical intervention to turn me into my dad.

But I know what you mean. I think people would either refer to it as 'maturity' or 'old-age', depending on who they are.

However, why is it when, perfectly legal, no drink, car all functioning properly, I *still* feel an awful sense of guilt and doom whenever I see a police car behind me? And am always *so* relieved when I see them turn off elsewhere through my rear-view?
HF


Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Rob the Bus
I know exactly what you mean. There's a road near me with a huge lay-by on it that Mr Plod likes to lurk in. However, today there were seven Plodbikes and three Plodmobiles, all with their lights flashing. Just as I approach, lead Plodbike pulls out an bars my way. I find myself mentally checking myself:

"Licence - check. Tax - check. MoT - check. Insurance - check. 300 kilos of finest marijauna - not as far as I'm aware."

Clearly, they were meeting up to go an escort somebody stupefyingly important but you can't help feeling guilty.

I know it sounds awful, but one of my mates has just completely changed his life and joined the Police and now I find myself watching what I say to him. Paranoid or what???
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
I know it sounds awful, but one of my mates has
just completely changed his life and joined the Police and now
I find myself watching what I say to him. Paranoid
or what???


Well, yes and no.

Personally I have the greatest respect for the police and admire them hugely - however, once or twice I've had friends with policemen husbands, and, again, even though I have done nothing at all wrong, there is still this feeling of being careful as to what you say. Weird isn't it?

But again, I have digressed from motoring here, so, Rob, unless I can think of something motoring related to say, I think I'd better retire from commenting on anything else for the night.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Rob the Bus
Me and thee both, chuck (as they sound round these parts.)

Good night :-)
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
And ter yer an' all geezah!! Night ;)
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Flat in Fifth
"I'm actually quite happy to turn into my Dad."

Comes to us all, told this story before but....

Suggs (as in Madness and Salvage Squad Suggs) standing at the bottom of his stairs shouting up at the kids (paraphrased)
" Turn it down!!!! Its too loud, and just what is that total rubbish you're playing anyway?"

Then he realised he was turning into his Dad. ;-)

Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Ian (Cape Town)
Hehe - myself and my boss were trying to explain Madness, The Specials etc etc to the young-uns at work the other day. Did we feel like old gits, or what? [Just think - that was 23 years ago, at least! And 23 years before that was 1957, and what 'total rubbish' was on the charts then?]
To keep on a motoring thread, we have also been trying to explain marvellous motoring experiences, like petrol at a tenth of what it is now, 70km/h speed limits (Govt. fuel economy days!), AM radios (the only decent music station was on AM), Drive-In cinemas, Roadhouses where the waiter brought your nosh on a small tray which clipped onto the window etc etc etc

Or even better: "when I was younger, I could fix my car myself, and change the oil, and tune the carb, and it would do 96MPH flat out on skinny 13 inch tyres ..."
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Were they playing Madness songs??

We all get to that stage at some point, with me it's been creeping up over the last year or so, and it's very strange. It's that moment when you suddenly realise that your parents weren't being totally unreasonable in all that they said and did, and even as you holler at your kids you can remember how you felt in the same situation, and understand the resentment that the kids feel as you metamorphose into the previous generation.

Still no motoring relevance, sorry.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - bafta
What did your mother also access her car through windows and boot?
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - DIRM
I'm not sure about turning into my Dad but since I'm now the proud owner of a much newer motor, my driving habits have changed. I used to bat around often on the wrong side of 80mph & flung the old car about a bit. Now I just cruise at 65/70mph in air conditioned comfort with Classic FM on or a CD & watch the rest of the rock-heads tear about. I was cut up yesterday by two or three idiots yesterday & the number of vehicles that shot past me was amazing.

I was never a boy racer myself (much preferred to build up the NCD, so I can now afford to drive a nice big motor) & still not hit 40. As you say, when the dibble are about I've no worries.
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
I was never a boy racer myself (much preferred to build
up the NCD, so I can now afford to drive a
nice big motor) & still not hit 40.


I don't believe that for a minute. Even I hit 40 from time to time, when in a 50 or 60mph limit.

Goodness knows what's happened to me, seems I haven't yet cast off my HF persona from last night.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - DIRM
Meant 40yrs old...I'm not that slow!
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - joe
Driving like this would be even more stress free if some idiot wasn't always sitting about 6 feet from your rear bumper. Once I have noticed them I start turning into Victor Meldrew, and have to fight the temptation to dab the brakes and give them a shock. It would be good if I could achieve a buddist like state of yogic calm. How is this achieved?
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Rob the Bus
Joe, easier said than done I know, but I just ignore them and let them stew in their own juices. If they want to run the risk of crashing into the back of me if I have to stop suddenly, then so be it. Besides, I've a whacking great towbar on the back (obviously!) that would do a lot more damage than just my back bumper!
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - madf
Funnily enuf SWMBO just commented yesterday I drove far more sedately than I did when we got married 3x years ago:-)


Don't want to drive like my dad did: he had a succession of accidents in his 60s and gave up driving much to our great relief.

Driving is harder work today becuase of greater traffic density: if I travel at 70 mph on the M6 I will little slower than 90mph cos there are long stretches with 50mph limits where you will be lucky to do 40 (around Brum for a start..:-(

Better be more patient and try to enjoy it is my motto.

As for the idiots driving I leave them alone. Poor sad s**s : will be plod fare sometime I hope.. or dead...
madf
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - TrevP
I had the reverse today - Plonka behind was almost having apopletic fit because I was doing 30.

Including several times pulling back and jumpimg forward to be only inches from the back of my car.

And he was Ederly driving a Skoda Fabis.

Me? I just smiled into mirror. He liked that. Not.
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Fullchat
In answer to your original question I believe its a change in attitudes and culture over generations. Drink driving was perfectly acceptable and if caught it was everyone elses fault. Over time continual 'education' has turned round our attitudes. However there are still those who dont give a dam.
Likewise speeding. Bit more contentious this one but I think we are all aware of the consequence of speeding at the wrong time and the impact on casualty figures. However the jury is still out on the social acceptability of speeding. Gradually - again through education heavy enforcement and engineering this is changing. Again there are those that will carry on regardless.
So you perceive that you are changing into your dad but after that first flush of youth we all probably are!
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - steveb
Re speeding - I agree entirely. The last five years have seen a proliferation of speed cameras and mobile traps - you simply just cannot zoom around now like you used to, and it is becoming more socially irresponsible to do so.

Personally, a couple of close speeding scares over the last three years has slowed me right down - sleepless nights waiting for the NIP has had its effect, and not something I want to repeat. Luck played a big part in the first - tooling along well above the limit on the M40, through a forward facing mobile trap on a bridge. Banged to rights I thought, and cold sweat for the next 150 miles home. Anyway, on arrival, found that the front numberplate which was held on by sticky pads - had slipped down under the front bumper - therefore invisible to the plod video. There is a god .....

Anyway, lesson learnt, and it's amazing the difference in fuel consumption sticking to c70 on the m'way...!

Steve
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Oz
For me the real conversion came 28 years ago at the moment that SWMBO announced 'you're gonna be a daddy'. Somehow the notion that a new soul was about to enter the world who would be dependent on *me* did the trick. Maybe it alerted me to the idea that when driving, we all substantially depend on the commonsense of other drivers round us. Is that too deep?
Oz (as was)
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Rob the Bus
Not at all Oz. I'd agree with that. It's the knowledge that your children depend on you being around that calms you down and makes you more philosophical about things.
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Yes. nothing more to say to that, but it does change us all.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - DavidHM
My dad is now a very sensible, mature driver. He is also 77 - but into his 70s I remember him driving with three figures up in an Audi 80. He is also the only driver ever to demonstrate heel and toe braking to me - on the apex of the bend into Reading Services westbound - and his road positioning, awareness and confidence were second to none for a long time.

Once he got a crappy Rover 214 he seemed to slow down and conform to the old man stereotype a lot more. He is particularly much too cautious about roundabouts IMO. Since he's moved from the Fiesta into the more 'grown up' Focus I really think his driving has improved and become more relaxed and confident again.

Even so, I would count his driving style among the things about him that inspire me. He taught me himself after I failed the first test with a driving school, and I think it's significant that a lot of what my father said was backed up by the instructor, who (also retired now) has a fantastic reputation where I grew up. If I turned into him, at least the way he was in his sixties, I wouldn't mind at all.
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Rob the Bus
It's amazing, isn't it, how when we are in our teens we think of our fathers as the last people we want to be. And yet as we grow older and have children of our own we begin to realise that our fathers are amazing people and actually an inspiration to us. Jeez, I'm starting to sound like a cheesy American soap here. Sorry. But I hope that you know what I mean.
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - andymc {P}
Mark Twain had his tongue firmly in his cheek when he said (paraphrasing here) "At age sixteen I was amazed at the depth of my father's ignorance. At age twenty-one, I was amazed at how much he had learned."
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Mark Twain had his tongue firmly in his cheek when he
said (paraphrasing here) "At age sixteen I was amazed at the
depth of my father's ignorance. At age twenty-one, I was
amazed at how much he had learned."


Andy - I think MT did very well to realise that by age 21!! It's taken me a while longer than that........
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
RTB and DavidHM,

Agree with both of you. My dad was the person who, in the end, and with a lot of tears on my part, got me through my driving test. I admire him totally, and he also did the same for my brother and 2 sisters.

What hurts me, though, is that the last 2 times I have been a passenger in his car, he has without even knowing it tried to drive through a red light. The horns from other motorists stopped him from continuing, but I'm left in a bit of a quandary here. If he had to stop driving, he and my mum would have no life outside of their local vicinity.

He drives a lot, and I guess he can't be that bad, because my mum is the worst passenger in all the world, even worse than me (so she says).

I don't think I even want answers here, do I, because what I imagine people would answer is not something that I could do.

So I will just revert to my original point, that I can sympathise completely with the situations that others have mentioned.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - DavidHM
I know you don't want answers, but... my father's driving has declined over the last 5 years, but seems to have stabilised and it was coming from a very high level to start with. I would rate him at his best among the 2 best drivers I know.

(The other is a friend who is also a brilliant mechanic, who passed his test first time with no minor faults and whose diagnostic process is simply to listen to the car. It's almost mystical).

He enjoys driving very much and it would break his heart if he had to stop driving. Therefore I'd think very carefully before advising him to stop, as I think that telling him that would be much more risky for his health than any reduction in awareness he has shown so far. Thankfully my mother is only in her early 50s and is a very safe driver, although she is not keen on long distances as he is. (This is a shame as both my sister and I live 200 or so miles from our parents).

Probably I would rate myself higher than my father at the moment, but he is still better than some of my friends who have clean driving records and who are 50+ years younger than him. At some point, I recognise that I am likely to have to say to him that he should give up driving, but I am hoping that it won't be for another ten years. (His uncle gave up at 91, so it's not completely unreasonable).
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
David thank you for that. I really appreciate it. You have a very wise head on rather young shoulders, if you don't mind me saying that.

Everything you say rings so true to me, and like you, I think that suggesting that my dad stopped driving would have a terrible effect on him. My mum's only 64, 8 years younger than my dad, but she has never driven, and certainly won't consider that option now. So if dad stopped driving, that would be it for them, as far as travel is concerned.

In the 'old days' my dad was the *only* person whose driving I felt safe with - and now I feel very sad that I don't feel the same anymore.

Good luck to you, David, if you ever have to say those words to your dad - guess we shall both have to do it, at some point - difficult, huh? but many thanks for your post.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - bazza
Difficult issue this one. I'm older than you and have been seen this firstly with both grandfathers and now with my father. Your father's high standard of driving is probably a source of great pride to him and there's no doubt he'll be gutted if advised to stop. I think you'll find he probably realises he's not as sharp as he used to be and he's probably mulling it over to himself. Certainly both my grand-fathers limited their driving to well known routes and local trips in their twilight years, eventually the decision to give up almost made itself. In my father's case, he doesn't stray far these days and I can see the same happening. So don't worry yourself too much, these things have a habit of resolving themselves without you having to concern yourself too much.
Baz
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Bazza, I know your post was directed at DavidHM, but I think it's just as relevant to me too, so thanks for writing it.

It's horrible seeing people getting older and not quite so alert and able as they used to be, isn't it?
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - bazza
Bazza, I know your post was directed at DavidHM, but I
think it's just as relevant to me too, so thanks for
writing it.
It's horrible seeing people getting older and not quite so alert
and able as they used to be, isn't it?
HF


Yes, I think it creeps up on us all! And the trouble is the roads are so fast and busy these days, all of us need our wits about us all the time. Glad my post was some help to you.
Baz
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Mark (RLBS)
>>My dad was the person who...... got me through my driving test.

Got a lot to answer for, that man.
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Oz
Aside from our responsibilities to others, etc., I've found that it is one helluva lot *cheaper* to drive with moderation and consideration - not least on insurance.
As a teenager it mattered greatly to me to win the traffic light grands prix. In later years the thought, "How sad am I if I need to prove, at my cost, that I can out-accelerate a total stranger whom I'll never see again in my life?"
Nowadays my pride and joy is a BMW but I'm sad to admit that the 'lack of moderation and consideration brigade' seems to comprise an unduly high % of fellow BMW drivers.
Oz (as was)
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Got a lot to answer for, that man.

>>

Hehe thanks M!!

And look at it another way - without my dad's driving lessons, you almost certainly wouldn't have the pleasure of my presence on this site. Food for thought, eh?

HF ;)
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - slefLX
There's no hope for me then. I'm only 23, been driving for 2.5 years and drive (as I always have) like some people perceive the parents drive, "getting older and driving sensibly malarkey" ;-)

Maybe it's because I haven't had the 'benefit' of observing and absorbing by osmosis anybody elses's bad driving habits. All my life we haven't had a car in my family, I'm the first to drive so I've not been in cars as often as others may have. I was never interested in driving until I started learning myself so any bad habits that drivers may have had I didn't notice and I was able to start from a completely clean slate. Maybe there's something to be said for depriving your children from constant lifts everywghre. ;-)
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Good luck to you, slefLX, that's an interesting point. And it sounds like you're a good driver too.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - dave18
I used to speed... not agressively but for example on 'open' roads, long stretches of rural 'A' road etc. I enjoyed my driving! Why past tense then? I was done for drink driving, Im not proud of it and Ive not complained about it either. When I happily get my licence back I know it'll definately stop me. Scary how easy it is to be over the limit.
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - HF
Dave18, I know your story and I respect you for learning a lesson from it. Good luck when you get your licence back.
HF
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - FergusTheDog
I have the opposite problem. My dad is turning into me, after years of soulless Japanese stuff he wants to buy an Audi. Happened to father in law a couple of years ago too.

Maybe I was just old before my time?
Help! I'm turning into my Dad!!! - Shortwing Rob
I blame my car.

Back about fifteen years ago the magistrates at Watford took my previously spotless licence away for 28 days on account of a minor contravention of the 70 mph limit. (Well actually 57 m.p.h. sort-of contravention)

So I bought a Frontera next, that slowed me down a treat. And other than a bit of discussion with a splendid pair of M-Way cops who caught me bang to rights on my motorbike and let me off with a statutory 35 quid I've been pretty law abiding ever since.

Eight cars later I have the Puma.

Oh dear!

Motorways and A roads see me at an almost law-abiding seventy-something.

But let it see a twisty country road and it turns into a total hooligan.

I'm sorry. I genuinely know it's wrong but....

Rob

 

Value my car