Slinker of the week - teabelly
My vote goes to the beligerant so and so in a Skoda on the M6 roadworks Friday night. They sat in the middle lane through the roadworks at 45. The left lane was clear. They didn't move across. Several cars came up behind them and had to go into the outer lane to get by. Then a lorry sat on their bumper for several miles, they finally moved over. As soon as the lorry went past they moved back into the middle lane even though they weren't overtaking anything on the inside lane! They were dawdling along and I wondered whether to undertake or not as I was just sitting in the inside lane but I assumed as they were so utterly ignorant they'd probably crash into me if I did so.
Slinker of the week - Armstrong Sid
I think you can find people like that on any road.

On my home patch, I've seen drivers exit a roundabout to continue along the (two-lane) ring-road and actually indicate right to go into the outside lane, and then just doodle along in that lane with no traffic on their inside. It's like they have some kind of inside-lane-phobia. They continue pointlessly in the outside lane for a couple of miles and then indicate left because they want to turn off.

And if I'm still running alongside them, I try not to let them back in.
Slinker of the week - Brentus
..Its obviously far more dangerous to go from lane1 to lane3 then back to lane..

Agree HJ, but you say pass on nearside not exeeding 50. I do this all the time , when a situation dictates but is it legal to do so i wonder ?.
Slinker of the week - dimdip
They sat in the middle lane through the roadworks at 45. The left lane was clear.


I'll sometimes approach them in the nearside lane and just hang back in their blind spot. This makes most people uncomfortable after a while, and in the majority of cases they'll either speed up, or indicate to pull back into lane 1.
Slinker of the week - teabelly
I can't remember whether I tried that. I shall remember for another time. I'm very averse to sitting in someone's blind spot though as it seems quite a dangerous place to be!
Slinker of the week - CraigP
Heard of (but never tried!) lapping a CLOGer -- when approaching in lane one:

Mirror / Signal / Manouvre out to lane 3 from a safe distance back.
Overtake CLOGer.
MSM back into lane 1, a safe & considerate distance in front of the CLOGer.
Ease off the gas so CLOGer overtakes you.

Lather, rinse, repeat :-)
Slinker of the week - L'escargot
I go from lane 1 to lane 2 and then to lane 3 in separate manoeuvres until I'm past the slinker, and then I return directly to lane 1 in one manoeuvre to make the point that they're hogging lane 2.

Edited by L'escargot on 28/12/2009 at 08:15

Slinker of the week - smokie
I've been known to do the same L'es but I also have passenger experience with a diehard and very committed CLOGer who just laughs and considers us pathetic. His rather twisted view is that he has paid his tax so he can drive where he wants.
Slinker of the week - paul2007
more often than not, those that drive carelessly on any roads, inc motorways are not concentrating. They are often using a mobile, hands free phone, smoking or eating.

The police need to get a grip and put a stop to these dangerous drivers that are resposible for accidents.
Slinker of the week - woodster
Bit of a pattern emerging in your posts Paul. You didn't formerly post as 'MrX' by any chance??
Slinker of the week - BobbyG
Well I either undertake on the inside lane, making sure there is a blast of the horn and a good stare at the other driver, or go up behind them in the middle lane with main beam flashing. Or other alternative is overtake on right but cut back into the middle lane just directly in front of them.
Well it makes me feel better :)
Slinker of the week - midlifecrisis
MLMs are a pet hate of mine. It's usually nothing to do with phones, eating or anything else. It's simply they are totally ignorant of the 'rules of the road' and have no situational awareness.

My comment of the year remains the young girl I stopped, who was driving in lane 3 of an empty motorway. "Why are you in the outside lane" says I. "I saw the signs that said 'don't hog the middle lane' and so moved over" replies she!

It was all I could do to stop myself from bursting out laughing it was so preposterous!!
Slinker of the week - Alby Back
Reminds me of the tale of the driver stopped for straddling lanes. "But officer, I've only recently got my licence and it clearly says 'tear down dotted line'....."
Slinker of the week - woodster
I can almost hear the collective groan at that one Humph!
Slinker of the week - gordonbennet
There's a whole army of middle lane cloggers out there, i wonder if you were unfortunate enough to follow them whether they'd be the ones who try to dictate how everyone else will drive on 2 way roads.

Either by driving deliberately or incompetently slowly on twisty bits and then mashing the foot to the floor when an overtake opportunity arises, or by deliberately making it difficult to let anyone else overtake elsewhere by closing gaps etc.
I suppose they are why we have to develop the slingshot overtake.

I have gone past them carefully on the inside if its a situation of 3 lanes of flowing traffic and they are being an obvious pita, but i don't undertake otherwise...which incidentally is becoming a common and sometimes dangerously performed manoeuver.
Slinker of the week - the swiss tony
MLC, for interest, what would your recommendation be when we come across these MLM's?
should we go from lane 1 to 3 then back to 1? (in some cases this doesn't feel safe, i.e. fast moving traffic in lane 3)
should be take station in lane 2 and hope they move across?
lane 2 and flash?
undertake (I am not happy doing that - feels wrong even when in a motorway junction slip lane)
slow down and stay in lane 1, until circumstances change?
Slinker of the week - BobbyG
mlc is traffic police so he will recommend the "PIT" manoeuvre, just catch the slinker n the back corner, send it in to a spin, and it will soon move out your way :)
Slinker of the week - dimdip
I'm very averse to sitting in someone's blind spot though as it seems quite a dangerous >> place to be!


I should clarify that I'm behind them and not overlapping, so if they do decide to suddenly pull into lane 1 without indicating, there won't be a prang.

I can recommend this as a first line approach to lane 2 hoggers (what does CLOG stand for?) . . . before moving on to direct action ;-)
Slinker of the week - Brentus
Like this post teabelly. This resonates with many people. Think i will be really nasty here and say treat them with the contempt they deserve.
Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
2 or 3 points arise here.

The only offence in motoring now is speeding, so if they are under 70, or the speed limit at roadworks, what are they doing wrong?

I hope none of the people complaining are members of the fast lane drivers club; they are imo far worse a driver because of their attitudes (smokers or not!)

And, whislt sitting in any lane is obviously not being aware of your circumstances, anybody here never made a mistake on a motorway etc? Mostly caused by boredom, driving at 1 speed regardless of what other traffic is around etc; its just as bad if you think about it!

Slinker of the week - Badwolf
The only offence in motoring now is speeding


Eh? I think not. If that's the case, I think I'll slip out for a drive later, once I've polished off the Weston's Cloudy Scrumpy that I'm currently enjoying... Have a gander here :
www.lawontheweb.co.uk/crimertotable.htm
so if they are under 70 or the speed limit at roadworks what are they doing wrong?


I'm not sure what the actual offence is, but I'm fairly convinced that Westpig, MLC et al would probably wish to speak to anyone who they catch doing this. Besides, rule 264 of The Highway Code states that "You should always drive in the left-hand lane when the road ahead is clear. If you are overtaking a number of slower-moving vehicles, you should return to the left-hand lane as soon as you are safely past."
And whislt sitting in any lane is obviously not being aware of your circumstances anybody here never made a mistake on a motorway etc?


Of course I have, one of which could have killed me and my two passengers. However, I'd class a mistake as a momentary laspe of concentration, not sitting in the middle lane at sub-speed-limit speeds for mile after mile.
Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
ok, my irony was not up to standard !

However, if you feel the MLOC is worse than the FastLOC then thats your choice.

Personally I hate both sets.

as regards a momentary lapse being less dangerous than the above? Consider that you at least expect them to stay where they are; but those that that swerve all over the place, make unpredicted moves etc etc are not as dangerous?

In my belief they are just as bad, and (arguably), more dangerous to your life?

Oh and the speed limit (clue is in the word) is the limit; not the target; you are entitled to drive at slower speeds than the maximum!

Edited by yorkiebar on 28/12/2009 at 15:52

Slinker of the week - Badwolf
as regards a momentary lapse being less dangerous than the above? Consider that you at
least expect them to stay where they are; but those that that swerve all over
the place make unpredicted moves etc etc are not as dangerous?


Fair point.
Oh and the speed limit (clue is in the word) is the limit; not the
target; you are entitled to drive at slower speeds than the maximum!


Couldn't agree more. However, it is extremely inconsiderate, when the inside lane is clear and the outside lane is heavy with members of your FLOC (joke!), to tootle along in the middle lane at 55mph thereby preventing someone who is doing 65mph from passing you. In fact, as I mentioned earlier, it is in direct contravention of The Highway Code and should any accident or incident result from your hogging the middle lane, your refusal to adhere to The HC would be frowned upon in Court.

Edited by Badwolf {P} on 28/12/2009 at 16:02

Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
You may mistakenly believe I am sticking up for the mloc and the floc ?

Both are as bad as each other !

The main point though, is a momentary mistake can be as (or more) life threatening than those dawdling in a predictable manner !

Make sure your own house is in order before worrying about others too much?

I was always taught to drive my own car, and those of everybody around me; to expect the unexpected, and allow myself room for other peoples errors etc. Good advice then, and more so now !

Oh and if it was a motoring offence, the police would be pulling these drivers up and showing them the errors of their ways? They only appear to stop (or catch on film) those motorists speeding? Understand irony btw ?

Edited by yorkiebar on 28/12/2009 at 16:06

Slinker of the week - Westpig
CLOG members are at the very least guilty of S3 RTA 1988 Driving Without Reasonable Consideration For Other Road Users

What gets you into FLOC? I have a horrible feeling I might be in that club. I do fastidiously revert back to the middle or inside lane when I can, but tend to spend most of my time in lane 3 nowadays...(although it changes on the more rural motorways, but sadly I don't often use them). Can you clarify please, i'd like to know if some of the population despises me and hitherto i've been ignorant of the fact...:-)
Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
membership of the FLOC is probably easier to obtain than mloc?

If you drive at 65/70 (I often do as I dont consider myself important enough to have to rush to/for anyone) then you will observe the important people flying along in the fast lane (outside lane for the correct identification) flashing headlights, sitting on bumpers etc to anybody who dares hold up their progress. Twice as dangerous as mloc members, who just dawdle along (admittedly unaware of their surroundings) but at a steady speed that can be worked around.

On a serious note (oh I was already) its perfectly possible to travel at or around 70 mph on motorways and use the inside lane the majority of the time ! My last trip of around 150 miles of M6/M42/M5/M4 was completed at or aound 70 mph and I visited the outside lane 5 or 6 times, and spent much more time in the inside lane than the middle lane, not having to alter my speed (other than through my choice) at all.

It depends on attitude and consideration as to what lane you spend most of your time in !

Think about that line and where you spend most of your motorway mileage before jumping in with any response!

Only a few years ago I used to compete for the space in the fast lane, (Im no angel) and found out I could get to same destination much more relaxed, more economically, and more importantly safer by adjusting my speed to around 70, rather than the 70/80 most try to achieve. Calculate the difference in time it takes to complete a journey at 5/10 mph slower and weigh the benefits; but I know it wont suit all!

For me, speed and aggression has its place; its just not on the road !
Slinker of the week - Westpig
I find it interesting that some think speed = aggression automatically. It can do of course, but equally so it can also mean someone simply wishes to drive faster than someone else does....and if they drive with a decent gap, are not pushy and have their wits about them, then so be it in my book.
Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
So someone driving over 70 (I have no objection to speed regardless what you may believe), lights on in the outside lane, flashing the driver in front, sitting on their bumper is only speed not aggression ?

It is observed daily on our motorways; whether you see it or not is due to various reasons of course!

Way more dangerous than mloc dawdlers !

Especially if the car in front refuses (or is unable) to move over for this important person because he will often move into middle lane to facilitate his passing manouevre if he is blocked for any time !

Thats not excusing mloc dawdlers; its more " there is more than 1 problem out there" and different problems affect/bother different people!

If I have offended you and you want to continue your membership of the FLOC, feel free. I wont call the police or anything!
Slinker of the week - jbif
Thats not excusing mloc dawdlers; its more " there is more than 1 problem out there" and different problems affect/bother different people! >>


Two wrongs do not make a right, but nevertheless I suppose you will carry on supporting CLOGs [and b.t.w. you protest so much so that I suspect you are one yourself ;-) ].
If I have offended you and you want to continue your membership of the FLOC, feel free. I wont call the police or anything! >>


note to yorkie: Westpig = West + pig = West London copper
M6 roadworks Friday night. They sat in the middle lane through the roadworks at 45. The left lane was clear. They didn't move across. >>


I think most roadworks instruct you to "stay in lane".

Edited by jbif on 28/12/2009 at 21:17

Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
Westpig = west london copper = above the law ????? I doubt it, but it certainly doesnt excuse his ignorance of the FLOC ! And in no way would it excuse the motoring antics of the floc! Btw I am not scared of police; they should only bother you if you have cause for their services (either friendly or opposite)

You believe me to be a mloc, you are welcome to; but you would be surprised !

Speed (and aggresion) has its place: its not the roads though!

I conduct my speed and aggression in a controlled area (admittedly in uncontrolled manner at times!)

The root cause of mloc, floc, wrong lanes at roundabouts, parking problems et al is almost certainly down to (lack of) attitude and consideration to other people (not just drivers)!

In which lane of the motorway do you spend most of your time may I ask ? I would guess either the middle or the outside!

Consider your own driving habits before hitting others maybe?
Slinker of the week - jbif
Speed (and aggresion) has its place: its not the roads though! >>


Well, it seems that the correct place for agression is this forum, innit? ;-)

Peace and happiness to all slinkers, mimsers, smokers, and CLOGs in 2010.

Slinker of the week - teabelly
Don't think they did say stay in lane. Would have remembered if they had I think. I think they only used to say stay in lane as specs enforcement failed when you switched lanes....
Slinker of the week - jbif
I think they only used to say stay in lane as specs enforcement failed when you switched lanes.... >>


That is reported to be a myth:
www.avforums.com/forums/motoring/986940-average-sp...l
www.theregister.co.uk/2008/07/21/speed_camera_myth/

In any case, "stay in lane" notices have been around for a long time, long before "SPEC" was ever even on the drawing board.

Slinker of the week - Lud
I used to be full-time FLOC Wp, and I still get out there quite often.

But the global mimsefest has worn me down a bit. In unfamiliar territory I often hang back to see what the experienced traffic is doing for fear of electronic law enforcement.

And of course these days, when all their brake lights go on and they slow to an unreasonably low speed to pass a camera, I would sail past at 2mph over the limit if the malevolent mimsing so-and-sos weren't doing it in all three lanes without a thought for the actual real speed limit or indeed for anything at all...

FLOC has the highest proportion of actual proper drivers on the motorway, almost 30 per cent sometimes on a good day if the gods are smiling. There are some really good fast white vans when you're lucky. But the good times - moments really, if you get ten minutes you're lucky - are all too short and getting rarer too.
Slinker of the week - CraigP
I tried being a CLOGer once, middle lane, eased off to 45mph in 70, but CLOGers just seem to slow down, very few overtook me.

Disappointed that a ton of boy racers sit in the middle lane, kinda expected them to take a pride in their driving.
Slinker of the week - DP
I just undertake 'em if there's room to do so. I don't think I've ever had one so much as notice, never mind get annoyed.

Driving on rails, totally oblivious to their surroundings.
Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
"I just undertake 'em if there's room to do so. I don't think I've ever had one so much as notice, never mind get annoyed.

Driving on rails, totally oblivious to their surroundings."


Thats it exactly, not good, not safe, not clever, but easily passed, and less dangerous than the weaving unpredictables out there !
Slinker of the week - OldSock
It's certainly an interesting phenomenon, and the causes are somewhat unclear.

Some of it may be down to references to 'slow lane' / 'fast lane'. Perhaps some folk don't use the (empty) SLOW lane because they don't consider themselves SLOW drivers.

If they were completely oblivious to their surroundings, as some suggest, then why don't they amble along in lane 3 (or 4, where it exists)?

I see it as a re-enactment of the classic John Cleese/Ronnie Barker/Ronnie Corbett sketch, with the CLOGs as the Barker character :-)

As for me - well, "I know my place"......
Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
An interesting observation for everyone; no replies needed in here. But be honest to yourself!

What lane do you spend most of your time in on a motorway?

I expect most in here to be FLOC members, with the temerity to criticise MLOC's.

I also expect very few to aim to be in the inside lane as much as possible (which is the correct use of the motorway system!)

There will be hundreds of excuses, mostly that its too dangerous to keep pulling in and out (yeah right!), too much traffic (its there because lanes are not used correctly; but I agree it stops you - in places! ), too much of a rush (speeding without concern for others and road regulations!) etc etc etc !

Slinker of the week - teabelly
Depends on the motorway conditions. Inside lane 99% of the time if it is quite free travelling. Going out to the middle to get passed and returning to the inside lane if there is someone wanting to get by. If there is more stuff to overtake then I'd stay in the middle but move back if someone approaches. Depends on the gap in the traffic and whether there is a chance of being stuck in the inside lane so I'd probably speed up so I am past the next lot to overtake before the next one behind in the middle catches me up. Don't tend to use the outer lane unless there are two trucks in the middle lane or others doing 60 ish when the outside lane is free. If it is very busy and the middle two lanes are truck infested I'd probably sit more in the outside lane if I can maintain a reasonable gap behind. If not I'd be in and out of the outer two lanes and maybe back to the inside if there was a large enough gap.

Main problem with the inside lane is due to its awful condition on most motoways due to the heavy trucks. The outside lane is much smoother to travel on.
Slinker of the week - Cliff Pope
Two points:

1) Surely if it's road works with a 50 mph restriction, then "undertaking" is not really overtaking on the left but just staying in a lane that happens to be moving faster than the one outside it? That's permitted.

2) It's surely perfectly legitimate to sound your horn and wait a few moments before continuing to undertake - that's merely making them aware of your presence, which is what a horn is for.
Slinker of the week - dimdip
I expect most in here to be FLOC members with the temerity to criticise MLOC's.
I also expect very few to aim to be in the inside lane as much
as possible (which is the correct use of the motorway system!)


Really? I would expect backroomers to be among the more aware and considerate drivers out there. (And, yes, I do stay in lane 1 as a default.)
Slinker of the week - yorkiebar
"Really? I would expect backroomers to be among the more aware and considerate drivers out there"

It would be nice to think so, but I think from attitudes and comments there are more FLOC's than any other driver in here!

But I am not asking people to describe their style and/or justify it to me. If people do it to themselves, really honestly, they may just be a bit more aware !!!

For the record, I make a point of being in the inside lane more than any other, but I am no mimser or dawdler !