"How to help a nervous case?"
Perhaps if she said "get off my case" every second lamp post or so....
Regards ;)
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Pass Plus course?
Edited by Round The Bend on 29/01/2008 at 07:52
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How about as a way to congratulate your beloved, buy her a car similar to what she passed in, or the cheaper alternative, pay the instructor to take her out for 2/3 lessons, and on the final one get them to take her on a motorway, but please no 10mph jobs
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Shes agreed that we hould take her to one of the large industrial estates on the edge of town on the weekend because they are almost deserted, have lots of roundabouts which she hates and the roads are very wide, so she can do laps until she feels beter about the car.
I didnt try explaining how the L-series works best, but she was driving along at 40 in 3rd and I care about my car :-) She also found it hard to get used to the large amount if dead travel with the gas pedal which is a characteristic of these cars and takes some adjusting to when you pull away.
She said I did very well and didnt say a word even tho she knew I was scared stiff!
Only time I made a comment was when her speed crept past the limit on a road with average speed cameras.
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Thats sensible in getting her way from traffic. A disused airfield or something similar. There she can trash around in relatively safety just concentrating on her control of the vehicle until she is happy that SHE makes the car do what SHE wants. Once this has been established then feed in areas with light traffic and on to heavy.
dvd
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> She said I did very well and didnt say a word even tho she knew I was scared stiff!
Says it all.
Take her the industial estate as planned, then get out the car go find a place that sells a good cup of tea and a bacon sarnie and leave her to it for an hour or so.
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I'd put a lot of the nervousness down to it being your 'pride and joy' and you mentally 'tut-tutting' in her mind even if you are not doing it out loud.
For daughter I got the driving instructor to take her out for two hours, driving SWMBO's car, on new roads in a new town and back on the Motorway.
For SWMBO - I went "there are the keys - I want to see 50 miles added to it today and everyday this week".
Both are much more confident now.
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Get her to do Pass Plus:
www.passplus.org.uk/
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No disrespect to your motor Stu - but for your fiancee driving the old Rover compared to a nippy, new & 'tight' 207 must feel like, well I don't know what. To her, a car is a 207 - anything else will feel very wierd, for a while at least - perhaps coupled with your, let's say, enthusiasm & (probable) zealous protectiveness for your venerable beast - it's a recipe for, isn't it?
Is there maybe a case for self reflection here - do you really want to 'share' a car? Maybe a longer term solution, as has been mooted, is get another car. Short of that perhaps, a bit more reflection might allow you to accommodate a more flexible view of what constitutes proper driving - maybe that's just how she drives & always will. As long as she's safe & observant - and feels safe - perhaps the 'issue' will simply slowly dwindle as her confidence & 'feel' in the new (old) car increases.
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I didnt try explaining how the L-series works best but she was driving along at 40 in 3rd and I care about my car :-) She also found it hard to get used to the large amount if dead travel with the gas pedal which is a characteristic of these cars and takes some adjusting to when you pull away.
I think you've answered your own question. What you consider might hurt your pride and joy is vastly different to most other people. No modern car will be hurt by 40mph in 3rd gear.
It only takes one comment to completely knock someone's confidence or set them against you. "Your way" could be completely different to her way even though both are probably equally valid, and the easiest approach is to stay out of the car while she's learning. At the very worst it'll probably get cleaned out a bit as well - do you never take it above 4000rpm, then? :-P
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How about a large scotch for a bit of dutch courage before she sets out? :-)
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>>She also found it hard to get used to the large amount if dead travel with the gas pedal
That sounds like a slack throttle cable to me. Can it be adjusted?
Once SWMBO was convinced it's nearly impossible to stall a diesel, she enjoyed pulling away at tickover, and found it easier to drive than a petrol.
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it's nearly impossible to stall a diesel she enjoyed pulling awayat tickover and found it easier to drive than a petrol.
blimey, you ought to try ours......both of us kept stalling it when we first got it, as do new drivers to it now.....(X Type 2.0D....)
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>do you never take it above 4000rpm, then? :-P<
Goodness no, the power tails off at 3000 and the turbo oil seals leak so all it does is smoke alot. 2500 is all you need in any gear. I try to be sympathetic with it because it is old and using water somewhere still and id rather not make it worse it.
The power band on my car is between 1700 and 3000 rpm, so aside from using more fuel, there is little advantage in revving it.
I just want to help my gurl adapt to a very old-fashioned type of diesel which she certainly hasnt come across yet.
The throttle in most Rover 400 diesels ive driven has a degree of dead travel, not to mention that they are a slow revving engine.
I do understand that she has been taught to pass the test rather than drive in everyday situations - it made me laugh to myself how they teach the very wooden steering action ( shuffling it with both hands ) which on the Rover, which has a few turns lock to lock means she couldnt steer quick enough to get round a tight corner, whereas I tend to steer with my left hand unless changing gear and steady it with my right, feeding it through my steadying hand when straightening up.
Thankyou for your suggestions - I shall have to take a back seat as it were and hope she doesnt crash it - and yes she was scarily bad - crossing lanes on roundabouts, no indicators, weaving in the road and failing to stop for roundabouts, not to mention having to look to see what gear she is in and not checking her mirrors.
By her own admission, she scared herself even, so hopefully its just a case of time and practice with my car, which as has been noted, wont feel anywhere near as tighta nd planted as the cars she learnt to drive in!
Edited by Webmaster on 30/01/2008 at 00:53
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the power tails off at 3000 and the turbo oil seals leak so all it does is smoke alot.
Get rid of the Rover lump, and treat your fiancee to a new car.
Edited by jbif on 29/01/2008 at 19:20
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At the end of the year we intend to but for the time being, its all we have.
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At the end of the year we intend to but for the time being its all we have.
So why are you so bovvered about her revving the old heap?
Sounds like it's a horrid old shed but you're being fussy about it.
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Don't be too hard on Stu. We often love things that are unlovely to other people.
It's like Bagpuss: "an old, saggy cloth cat, baggy, and a bit loose at the seams, but Emily loved him."
Always used to make my eldest cry, that bit.
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It's like Bagpuss: "an old saggy cloth cat baggy and a bit loose at the seams but Emily loved him."
But please don't tell my wife about this!
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"Pass Plus course?"
Good idea. Mrsb went from Corsa to the Avensis I had when she passed. She did her Pass Plus in the Avensis.
Cheers
Peter
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It is an old shed really but its very clean, ive spent loads on it and since mid October its given me 7000 miles service which for a 12 year old shed is more than most would ask.
I dont like the engine being revved because it has started getting rattly, perhaps due to water in oil over a long period causing wear as it was fine until that problem occurred. As such I want to nurse it to the end of the year as we are waiting for a house to sell and the way the market is, it could be a long wait, but cannot afford to buy the new car until the house sale happens as we dont have the cash to replace it at the moment.
She is being very positive about it all and wants to get in lots of miles with the car to get used to it.
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You can get a car that'll do a years "service", and looks OK, for a few hundred quid. The "housing market" is stuffed, if I may say that, and highly likely to get mush worse - so I wouldn't bank on it.
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Thats what the Rover was - years MOT, 6 Tax and full history and it was tidy, but so many things went wrong in succession, theres no sense in buying another old car and risking that. The Rover has another year in it so it would be fool hardy to ditch it now its been fixed up.
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It's OK, Stu - we understand! :-)
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Get a driving instructor to take her out in your car not a school car.
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Good idea thanks :-)
I should perhaps teach her how to top up the coolant too as bless it, its using a litre of coolant every 600 miles now. Darned old cars, who would have em eh?
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Get fiance to save up and get her own car! I can't help thining that your preciousness over your big old car is what's going to knock her confidence right down.
The day I passed my test, I was sent out in mum's Fiesta on my own, and told not to come back for an hour. I think the comment was: "I don't care if you go and park it up around the corner, but you've got to get used to not having anyone in the passenger seat."
Do you trust her to go out in her own in your car? (I reckon I know the answer to that!)
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>>I should perhaps teach her how to top up the coolant too as bless it, its using a litre of coolant every 600 miles now. Darned old cars, who would have em eh?
Flippin 'eck, even as a fellow Bangernomics driver it sounds like this one is about ready for the great car park in the sky, to return as a cheap Chinese washing machine ;-).
Maybe there's still a few Mk.3 cavaliers or similar around for a few quid that are somewhat less shed like, and certainly easier to drive?
... and on a more serious note, if your partner did go out on her own, and this unreliable Rover broke, would she stand any chance of fixing it, or limping home on 3 cylinders for example?
Edited by SpamCan61 {P} on 31/01/2008 at 13:17
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Flippin 'eck even as a fellow Bangernomics driver it sounds like this one is about ready for the great car park in the sky to return as a cheap Chinese washing machine ;-).
It does sound like it.. it's the time spent fiddling with the things, as well as the cost of bits...
Maybe there's still a few Mk.3 cavaliers or similar around for a few quid that are somewhat less shed like and certainly easier to drive?
I've got one of them. It doesn't use water, or oil, and has done 170Kmiles, and could well be capable of cruising at 90MPH, were it actually permitted.
Cough.
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This thread reminds me very much of a friend. She passed her test and her husband happily took her out driving in 'their' car for the next few days. A week later a friend visited and asked how much 'solo' driving she had done. None. The friend was insured 'any driver' so got the new driver to drive her to the nearest town and back then sent her off on her own.
The following day she was driven to her husband's place of work by (same) friend - she went in and said 'I just need the car keys" and off she went. Thereafter he, poor soul, had to walk the half mile to work while she used the car.
Allow her to go solo and no p plates - people treat learners badly enough. If she stalls people will just sigh - if some know she is a new driver then they will blast horns etc and a simple stall will become a really nerve-wracking incident.
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Poor soul had to WALK half mile to work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Yup ... we all felt very, very, very sorry for him lol . There was the suspicion that the car had only been taken to work so his wife did not have access.....
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Update - she is alot better now even though she hasnt been driving a huge amount, she has been out on her own on set routes that she knows.
Ive also sent her out to test drive cars on her own, a huge step for her but aside from finding a Picanto's brakes a bit fierce, she has done very well indeed.
The big test is that she wants to drive Northampton to Diss on the A14 for our holiday in two weeks time, where she will follow me in the lilac wonder, her in her new car. It should hopefully give her some proper mileage on dual carriageways which she doesnt currently get.
She still doesnt drive at the speed limit all the time but she is far more decisive when pulling out and doesnt drive over-slow, usually within 10% of the limit which is preety well what I do anyway.
She has even elected to now drive her new Picanto to work everyday rather than have me drop her off so I think the fear must have subsided.
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I know it's absolutely nothing to do with me but I'm beginning to feel I know you, your family and your cars quite well.
So, like an elderly and easily confused relative, I'll ask: why are you taking both your Charade and your Picanto to Diss for your holiday?
Best wishes.
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let her test drive an automatic. she will say oh i like this
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Re Holiday - My nan has a large airbed ( the bag it fits in is 5 ft long )which she needs to take, plus her wheelchair and baggage for three people. My parents are taking the Coupe which will just about take their stuff and with it being a self-catering holiday, obviously you take more junk than on a package jaunt.
We were going to be pushed to fit it all in the Subaru even and were likely to have been taking both cars even then. Its ok though as my nan has offered to pay for the fuel
( since its down to her extra baggage ) for one of the cars so no loss on our part.
Re automatic - she already does. Forester is automatic and the Picanto shes moving into is also auto. She does have a manual license but she loaths driving manuals as she hates driving anyway.
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when your going out together allow plenty of time and get yourself in the passenger seat before she does, when she does something wrong do get to cross just say you maid slight error their . her driving will only improve and devolp with pratice ,. good luck.
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I must say, having followed her and been floowed by her, she now appears on the outside atleast, as a cautious but very good driver, indicates by the book, doesnt take chances and her road positioning is virtually spot on now.
I dont really go in the car with her as she always asks me to drive, but on the occasions that I do sit in the passenger seat, I always have it set as far back as possible so that Im totally out of her line of sight and I tend to look out the window and not hold onto anything so that she gets the impression Im comfortable, which for the most part, I am now. Its all good and im very proud of her - atleast shes not one of those new drivers who thinks they are gods-gift and indestructible ( have a neighbours daughter like this ).
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I can't say my wife really liked me sitting in the passenger seat when she first started to drive, snorting and haranguing her for hesitancy and mimsing, but she rolls along invisibly now and sometimes herself complains about absurdly slow crawling drivers. I would say she drives with great care and concentration though and she doesn't exceed speed limits as I do.
People have to go solo soon after they pass the test. After all most of them have been driven often enough to know how to behave in unfamiliar conditions, for example joining a motorway.
It is also very good for learner drivers to have to cope with London from the off. Baptism of fire, make or break.
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Less of the 'break' talk, she is on my insurance until its up for renewal!
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she doesn't exceed speed limits as I do.
In the interests of strict accuracy, my wife did once drive the rough old Skoda 130 I had at the time back from a funeral in Cheshire at which I had spoken and also imbibed too freely to drive back. On the busy M6 some time after dark, my eye fell on the speedometer which to my fuddled surprise was nudging 90. I was unable to prevent myself from saying something slightly nervous and reproving.
In the back of the car were two old friends, one a Trinidadian and the other a Jamaican retired boxer. They both told me to shut up, so I did.
That was the only time. But I still hope she never reads this.
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