Growlette is recuperating from an operation therefore I am confined to barracks as errand boy. This has caused the idle grey matter to ruminate on how and why manufacturers generate such apparently meaningless names for cars. Presumably the appellations Yaris, Exalta, Camry, Astina, Revo, Starex, Mondeo are meant to resonate in some strange way with aspirations to get in and drive on, or to connote some vision of desirability which, I have to say, excludes me, for one.
One imagines a group of intense yuppie marketing graduates huddled late into the night to pick just the combination of letters which is (a) still pronounceable, and (b) bears no relation to anything automobile, beings animate or inanimate whatsoever. Then all this has to be presented (more meetings, more Powerpoint slides, more expense account lunches and overtime vouchers to successive layers of management until finally the head honcho puts his John Hancock on it, hands are thrown up in triumph, cheers resound, and the ad agency's phones start ringing. Cost accountants the while are working the cost of all this into the sticker price of your new pride (with apologies Ko Lia) and joy (I don't think THAT's been used yet).
Or maybe someone just chucks a few parameters in a computer (max 6 letters, gotta have an "X" in there somewhere cos the ad agency psychologist says X's are good, no two vowels together except "a" and "u"), then slides off for a three hour lunch while some program does the rest.
I suppose all the Prowlers, Falcons, Mustangs, Escorts et al have been used up, that's why.
IN a more practical vein I read the agonised poster's comments about no motorway comfort rooms being open on one of his trips. Spending hours in traffic jams myself I empathize with the cross-legged agony which can result.
My local pharmacy stocks the "Jingle Bag", a life-saving invention which is a plastic bag full of a substance which turns the contents to jel, and which has a (ahem..) shall we say "gender-free" fitment on the neck. The makers also thoughtfully provide a wipe in a sachet to take care of any collateral damage as well. Having tested it on both sexes I can vouch for its efficacy, and at 1.20 pounds, a pair of Jingles is now part of the Growler travel kit.
Ah, that feels better.
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Contraption as described used by aviators. Can be found in "Transair" catalogue often inserted in "Pilot" magazine. Or search for Transair site.
OK, then, daftest car name ever?
rg
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Surely this must be the Nissan Cedric.
The technical manager of a firm I used to deal with was promoted to an overseas Area Manager, operating out of the Phillipines. With the job went a Nissan Cedric. He told his boss: "I am NOT driving about in a car called Cedric" and after a long tussle he was given another car (I think it was a Peugeot 405 or 406).
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Lancia Y10 (white hen)?
or, (sorry, again, Lancia)
Lancia Dedra
rg
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The Daihatsu Ladyboy Supreme LC225
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One of the problems is finding a name that works across the globe, GM having burned their fingers with Nova (loose Spanish for 'won't go'). But I agree about the methods - how much did Ford spend on 'Focus'? Someone said that to arrive at the name, they employed an Escort group...
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Is it true about the Mitsubishi "Starion", that should have been called "Stallion"?
Or is this just another urban myth?
rg
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I heard that, too.
Marketing man on phone to Mitsu: "We think you should call it the Stallion"
Mitsu man: " Ah, Starion - excerrent!"
Bearing in mind that most business in Japan is conducted verbally (because writing it down is so difficult), this has the ring of truth about it.
FWIW, I thought Starion was rather a good name...
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How about the Toyota MR2. In France this is pronounced "merde"... 'nough said?!
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Perhaps the daftest name in hindsight was the Allegro.
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Volkswagen Sharon Carrot? (might have been carat)
Lee.
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I have seen a bumper badge, saying (in the VW font) Rabbit injection. It features two rabbits, er, at it ...
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Re the Allegro, let alone the name what about the "Quartic" steering wheel?!
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More:----just watching BBC World TV and a completely daft commercial for the Hyundai Elantra - slogan "prepare to want one". Hands up anyone whose acquisitive juices go into overdrive upon hearing the word (if it is a word) "Elantra"?
Nobody? Oh, well back to the Random Car Name Creator software then.
In my Australian days in the 1960's we had the Isuzu Bellett and the Holden Monaro.
Growlette said Honda Civic was a daft name. But I think its roots are logical, were they not the letters "CVCC" which the original model was called, and they meant something, which eventually led to the word Civic because that's what the name looked like. I know back in Saudi I remember the appearance of a small Honda with CVCC on the back around the mid 1970's. Anyone recall what they stood for?
The theme develops off into sub-themes as well. For example, a reasonable name but totally unsuitably applied. Chevrolet Caprice -- a vast lumbering bath-tub about as far as it is possible to get from the concept of capriciousness. And the inaptly named Pontiac Parisienne, another aircraft-carrier about as chic and feminine as an Abrams M-1 tank.
Then there was the unfortunate Oldsmobile Cutlass, instantly dubbed the "Gutless".
Maybe it's all to do with PC and the manufacturers can't afford to risk upsetting some special interest group or chip-on-the-shoulder minority or other by using a word that means something.
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Speaking of the Holden Monaro, a new version has been introduced in Aus based on the Commodore. Looks damn good. And is cheap compared with euro cars there.
Paul C
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Another challenge!! CVCC stands for Compound Vortex-Controlled Combustion. Launched in 1971, it was the first engine to comply with the US Clean Air Act emission requirement without a catalyst.
Andy
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THe Growler wrote:
> Then there was the unfortunate Oldsmobile Cutlass, instantly
> dubbed the "Gutless".
>
Growler,
The Cutlass owned by a friend of mine is a far cry from gutless.
It's a '70 Cutlass 442 Convertible. 455ci with around 350 bhp. Red with white interior and hood, it's a beauty !
Kevin...
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Most Allegros didn't get out much due to being "mechanically challenged", so steering wheel not that important...
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Didn't Allegros get the Square Wheel award that the AA(?) was handing out to no hopers at the time? :-)
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Ford's '80s names had a lot in common with a certain type of special interest magazine. Sierra, Escort, Fiesta...
Rob F
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When you think about it Fiesta is a pretty daft name for a car, but it's been around for so long that now you associate the name with the car and vice versa.
I think most manufacturers are clued up to the fact that you need a name that means nothing. That way the name gets associated with the car and not the other way round. Of course the there are exceptions, Mitsubishi were asking for it with the Charisma.
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edit - name with the car and vice versa.
into name with the car and not vice versa
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We used to refer to cooking ones as Ford Siestas.
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All of which nicely brings us round to cars which should have had *other* cars names-
My contribution is the Porker 911 should have been a Scorpio, sting in the tail due to both power and handling methinks.
Growler,
hope Growlette is soon back up to spec.
best rgds,
Stuart
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Years ago, Jasper Carrot had a few "realistic" names for cars after a rant at the manufactures efforts...
Amongst my favorites were (IMMSMC) the :-
Vauxhall Insipid
Ford Bland
CV
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From a DT article a few months back about names that Japanese car manufacturers give their cars (some of these are concepts cars):
Toyota Synus, Mitsubishi Dingo, Suzuki Alto Afternoon Tea, Toyota Country Boy and Deli Boy Supreme, Mitsubishi Lettuce, Isuzu Begin Funky Box, Nissan Nails, Honda Life Dunk, Mazda Secret Hideout, Daihatsu Naked F, Toyota Cist, Suzuki Van Van (not actually a van), Daihatsu Terios Kid, Honda Fit, Mazda Bongo Friendee, Isuzu Big Horn, Mitsubishi Delica Space Gear, Nissan Datsun, Suzuki Every Landy and Toyota Sparky.
They obviously lose (or gain) something in translation!
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I thought Skoda 'Rapid' was contravening the trade description act until I was told the name referred to the depreciation....
Mike
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Doesn't Pajero (as in foreign Shogun) mean "w*nk*r" in colloquial Spanish? Dead right then....
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Not entirely on topic, but they make racing games:
Sega is apparently Italian for w*n**r
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I knew CVCC meant something, thank you. And thanks to Stuart. La Growlette is complaining, which is an excellent indicator that strength is returning.
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Yes, very unfair to call it Gutless. Is that the one with the big "442" on each front fender?
A medical friend of mine told me once "VTEC" is in fact a strain of intestinal bacterium like E. Coli. So, if anyone's Honda isn't up to scratch and is giving them s***s, that might be why.
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Growler,
yes, but the decals on his are fairly subtle, about 2 inches high chromed badges. Even with the 'sports' package it handles like the QE2... but in a straight line, or just cruising around with the top down on a warm Texas night... wonderful !
Ohhh, hurry up summer... please..? pretty please..?
Kevin...
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I agree. It's not a proper car unless it displays total disregard for the world's finite oil resources, has 8 cylinders, makes lots of noise, leaves rubber at the lights and is very big. I think now it was the Pontiac similar year and shape which had the large 442 on each side. My neighbour in Bahrain used to have one. It's not true they won't go round corners, they just require more skill plus a good sense of direction on the part of the driver.
But I'm off the thread ahagin...
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