Private Plate Abuse - Miller
I guestimate 1 in 3 private registrations I see are altered in some way - spaced incorectly, studs used to alter certain letters or numbers, size variations - for example 7's made to look like 1 or I.

Whilst obviously hardly a major crime do the police actually bother to stop any of these offenders? - judging by the numbers abusing the system I doubt it.

P.S. I am not knocking private plate buyers in general, I have one myself.
Private Plate Abuse - Imagos
There is no such thing as a private plate, (a very common misconception) They are called 'Registration marks'

The types of registration marks are :-

Dateless.

Prefix.

Suffix.

Whatever the current systems called.

I think your referring to 'cherished' plates, which are bought, sold, transferred etc by their owners. Any plate can be transferred as long as it doesn't make vehicle look newer than it is. I'm a 'cherished'(dateless) registration mark owner and i'm in the majority. It's displayed correctly. The main culprits I think are the ones who buy Prefix or Suffix marks in order to make them look like a word.

It's very important to us cherished owners, there's no such thing as a private plate!
Private Plate Abuse - Ian (Cape Town)
I've just spent a few delightful days in that sodom-and-gomorrah called "Johannesburg". There, plates are buyable - up to 7 characters, suffixed by "-GP" (GP= gauteng province)
I've never seen so much self-indulgent tat in my life!!!!
MY BMW-GP 4U2NV-GP etc ...
Also, the amount of cars sans rear plates ... At the pub we were at on Tuesday, I saw 6 or 7 without plates - Porkers, Audis, BMW's etc. Apparently, there are so few police on the road, the chances of getting stopped in 6 mths are minimal - then they fine you R500 (ie - less than a serious speeding fine) so everyone does it!
Private Plate Abuse - Kevin
There are plenty of 'massaged' plates around Basingstoke/Reading. With the level of ANPR activity at the moment I'm surprised there are still so many. Similarly the number of cars with pseudo-itallic plates.

Presumably ANPR is intelligent enough to read the plates but plod doesn't deem it serious enough for a pull.

>At the pub we were at on Tuesday, I saw 6 or 7 without plates - Porkers, Audis, BMW's etc.

Ian,
I was in Sandton a while ago and noticed this myself. I'd just assumed they were trade vehicles.

Kevin...

PS.

Jo'burg is the only place I've been where cars in long-term parking are wrapped in clingfilm.
Private Plate Abuse - cockle {P}
I guestimate 1 in 3 private registrations I see are altered
in some way - spaced incorectly, studs used to alter certain
letters or numbers, size variations - for example 7's made to
look like 1 or I.
Whilst obviously hardly a major crime do the police actually bother
to stop any of these offenders? - judging by the numbers
abusing the system I doubt it.


Probably not, but they might have a little surprise come MOT time; the spacing and font on plates is now subject to check in the MOT. Mind you, I suppose they can always swap them for a set of 'kosher' plates for the MOT and swap them back afterwards.

Personally I don't have an issue as long as you can work out what the correct VRN is supposed to be in a hurry, after a hit and run, for instance.
Cockle
Private Plate Abuse - machika
With some, where they use a different font, for example, it can be very difficult to tell the correct VRN.
Private Plate Abuse - martint123
I followed one in Brigg and it was so blatant I don't know how she got away with it. I can't remember the actual plate but was like J3NNY but with the 3 flipped round to be E, but curved. The font for letters and numbers was right, except for the reversal. Couln't believe my eyes.

Martin
Private Plate Abuse - L'escargot
I followed one in Brigg and it was so blatant I
don't know how she got away with it. I
can't remember the actual plate but was like J3NNY but
with the 3 flipped round to be E, but curved. The
font for letters and numbers was right, except for the reversal.
Couln't believe my eyes.
Martin


I used to see J3NNY regularly in the ASDA carpark at Carcroft near Doncaster. As far as I can recall the car was a MINI.
--
L\'escargot by name, but not by nature.
Private Plate Abuse - ndbw
I too like cockle dont mind cherished plates as long as you can read them,but I do have a gripe about funny scripts that are very difficult to read and could result in being unable to identfy a hit and run driver

ndbw
Private Plate Abuse - Wee Willie Winkie
There is a 4x4 regularly parked outside a police station in Ainsdale (a 'suburb' of Southport) that has a mis-spaced private place. It's actually parked right next to the station, where the police cars normally park.

Why don't the police do something about it?

1. It probably belongs to one of them.
2. It's a part time police station so is only open about 2hrs a week anyway

DB
Private Plate Abuse - Wee Willie Winkie
Duh. Plate, not place.
Private Plate Abuse - Aprilia
Lots of odd fonts and spacings around where I live. There has been an MPV running around for the last two years with wrong spacing and a '2' made into a 'Z'. Also been to my son's school this evening and parked next to a newish BMW convertable with a plate in a very strange font - sort of 'curly italic' with a shadowing effect - very difficult to read even at close range.
Private Plate Abuse - AR-CoolC
I saw a good one on the motorway yesterday. No mis-spacing or altered letters. It was on a van that does the mobile tuning. The plate was A2 NUP very clever.
Private Plate Abuse - artful dodger {P}
The best straight plate I know is on a van belonging to a kennel - K9 FUN. No need for special spacing or doctoring to read this one.
Private Plate Abuse - Chad.R
>>..... that has a mis-spaced private place. It's actually....

Hey, I know a couple of jokes about a mis-spaced private places :-)

OK, back to the original thread...

If I was to buy a "cherished plate", I'd get "C11 ADR" and put a screw in between the two 1s to make it look like a H. Now that would be illegal would it - as long as the screw was a "proper" fitting?

Not vain (or rich) enough yet though! :-)

Chad.
Private Plate Abuse - machika
Registration plates should be easy to read and anything that renders them difficult to read is questionable. How there is such a proliferation of plates with numbers that are difficult to read I just don't understand.
Private Plate Abuse - daveyjp
I see the plate R8 MEO regularly. When it was first fitted yellow and white screw caps were placed on the 8 to make it look like a 0. I've noticed this morning that the caps are now black - the fact the car was featured in the local rag may have brought it to the attention of the police.
Private Plate Abuse - patently
AS02BED made me smile. It was spaced as:

A S0 2 BED

of course, and fitted to a show-off car.

Private Plate Abuse - Dynamic Dave
If I was to buy a "cherished plate", I'd get "C11 ADR"


Currently fitted to a Kawasaki ZX 600-F3.
Private Plate Abuse - Jonathan {p}
J3NNY is currently residing on a ML320

K9 FUN and A2NUP are both on Hyundai H100s.

R8MEO is on a Hyundai Coupe
Private Plate Abuse - patently
R8MEO is on a Hyundai Coupe


Please tell me he didn't pay more for the plate than for the car. Please.

Anyone know where 911 TOY is?
Private Plate Abuse - Vansboy
as mentioned previously - showing I'm as sad as everyone else, in the number plate world....

My Meastro van (only 322,000 miles on it now!!)
VAN 580Y

Her Mx5 (our surname is Budgen)
B11 DGN

Now,long gone, our Jaguar Sovereign, Debbi's car, really,
DEB 50V


No incorrect spacings/styles used here.

VB
Private Plate Abuse - none
I can't afford a personalised number plate - I don't need one neither, but I have considered mutilating my current number plate to read DCXLV111 VCR Would this be acceptable under current legislation ?
Private Plate Abuse - NowWheels
I have considered mutilating my current number plate to read
DCXLV111 VCR Would this be acceptable under current legislation ?


Might best to wait to wait until the next Roman invasion. I'm sure that sort of thing will be approved then
Private Plate Abuse - Doc
Seen today: B4 CEX!



Private Plate Abuse - rhino
The best I've seen, and only ones I would consider, were on a pair of vehicles parked side by side in a smart house in Chelsea.

2BE NOT 2B

Class:)
Private Plate Abuse - No Do$h
On a Range Rover in Salisbury last week:

X5 NOT
Private Plate Abuse - greenhey
Come on - don't you realise what a service these people are providing ?
It menas we can identify them as pink fluffy bunnyrabbits without the time and effort of speaking to them .
The pathetic effort that goes into creating (illegal) plates , that aren't even amusing or clever identifies a whole group in our society who I would guess display other moronic facets to go with that.
Can we also include:
people who carry cycles on the back, obscuring the plate and lights ( apparently some do it because they have been told it will save them at speed cameras)
The infamous blue light boys
Private Plate Abuse - Aprilia
Can we also include:
people who carry cycles on the back, obscuring the plate and
lights ( apparently some do it because they have been told
it will save them at speed cameras)
The infamous blue light boys


Yes, I reckon when the 'blue light boys' grow up a bit they buy private plates!
Unfortunately I have a private plate (or 'cherished number' - LOL!) on one of my cars. It was on the car (an MB) when I purchased it. I do feel it marks me out as a bit of a prat - I must get around to swapping it back sometime soon!
Private Plate Abuse - none
No Dosh,
I spotted X5 TOY on a BMW X5 yesterday. It was parked in the customer car park of the company I work for. Unfortunately the driver and myself had to pass each other on foot in the car park. Just before he turned his superior head away from me, (another form of attention seeking ?) I swear I saw megalomaniac tattooed on his forehead.
Private Plate Abuse - No Do$h
I've seen that plate on an X5 (TOY). Possibly West London/Middlesex/Surrey way? I remember the plate and car but not to sure on the location.
Private Plate Abuse - Kevin
>I've seen that plate on an X5 (TOY). Possibly West
>London/Middlesex/Surrey way?

Reading maybe? I've seen it on the A33.

A Bentley Continental GT was alongside me on the A33 at M4 J11 yesterday. Reg. No. 'GRF'.

Kevin...
Private Plate Abuse - codefarm
Rolls Royce on M32 near Bristol years ago: HAN 50N.
Private Plate Abuse - henry k
Rolls Royce on M32 near Bristol years ago: HAN 50N.

His friend ROB 50N is in my area.
Private Plate Abuse - henry k
X5 NUT in the Kingston /A3 area on guess what?
Yes a black version.
Private Plate Abuse - Oz
There's no end to people's imagination. One plate I enjoyed with otherwise innocuous lettering but with 'adjusted' spacing was
W M02ART. Into classical music no doubt.

Oz (as was)
Private Plate Abuse - smokie
I have a photo of BOY5 on the back of an AMG Mercedes.

One day they'll grow up to be M3N I suppose....
Private Plate Abuse - Wales Forester
Seen regularly in the staff car park at a local police station - B16 COP on a Volvo estate, I kid you not.

PP
Private Plate Abuse - JSG2
There was a lad at Birmingham Uni a few years back whose father obviously had cash to burn.

He was driving a brand new Mini Cooper with the number plate 5 ON illegally spaced.

I don't understand the culture of trying to personalise a mass produced car by fiddling with the number plate. Pretty desperate if you ask me.
Private Plate Abuse - Adam {P}
Personalised plates doesn't really evoke that much emotion from me. Providing they are easy to read should there be a hit and run, what's the problem.

Their car, their money but £75,000 for A4EX does seem a little pricey to me.
--
Adam
Private Plate Abuse - NorthernKev {P}
Recent sighting is on a van reading DJ 51ORE, which is rather clever, bet they can't wait till 2007 to buy another van...

Kev
Private Plate Abuse - smokie
As per usual with these "rather clever" ones, the meaning has passed me by...

And I have a very High IQ, according to Anne and Test the Nation!!! :-)
Private Plate Abuse - Deryck Tintagel
Exeter Ferrari / Maserati dealership have a transporter with the plate EAT 911T. Obvious reference to Porsche :-)
Private Plate Abuse - frostbite
As per usual with these "rather clever" ones, the meaning has
passed me by...


Would love to enlighten you, but I'm in the same boat on that one.
Private Plate Abuse - PhilW
Saw a huge stretch limo on the M1 on Sunday with the reg B16GER.
Mind you, I have to say that many of these personal (!) plates have me saying "What on earth is that supposed to mean?"
Private Plate Abuse - Hugo {P}
Saw in West Cornwall (St Mawes to be Precise) a Jeep with J55P ** (can't remember the last two letters).

May personalised plates in this area are based around the old local area marks ie RL, CV and AF with an appropriate first letter eg GRL or TAF. I actually like this as it promotes the locality of the area rather than trying to be clever.

I am personally after any low number or yearless THS plate at a knock down price, as these are the initials of my business name.

...or maybe I should just settle for BOD 9 E :)

Read my profile to find out....

:)

H
Private Plate Abuse - blue_haddock
i'd love to get KEV1N but i don't wanna think about what it would cost if it was actually available
Private Plate Abuse - Garethj
For anyone in London, Pimlico Plumbers vans often have some quite well thought out plates, judging by the number of vehicles they have it must be someone's full time job just buying plates!
Private Plate Abuse - Wales Forester
Saw a Mazda RX8 this morning with JASONS in fancy script lettering front and back, god knows what it should have read.
How do these people get away with it?

IMHO The number plate should be withdrawn without any second chances in cases like these.

PP
Private Plate Abuse - blue_haddock
only possible combination i can see would be J45ONS then using some dubious font/spacing
Private Plate Abuse - keo-the-dog
check out the dvla auction lists, they are listing numbers that they must know are going to be tampered with to make the number look more like the word . not only that look at the prices of anything that could be altered and it's more expensive , i think they are encouraging mis spaced plates , as it makes money.
Private Plate Abuse - Kevin
blue_haddock said:

>i'd love to get KEV1N

The wife spotted KEU 1N for sale in the Telegraph or Times motoring section a few weeks ago. I think it was POA.

Kevin...
Private Plate Abuse - blue_haddock
it's close but not quite good enough!
Private Plate Abuse - tyre tread
I spotted my initials and 1 (AHJ1) on the plate of an exotic sports car at Goodwood festival of speed. I spoke with the owner who tolm me he paid £65 for it (the plate) in 1962 - I asked him if he wanted to double his money :-) I bet you can guess his reply!

Same car was on the cover of Classics magazine a couple of months ago so I had to buy a copy.

I can't remember what the car was now but it was Italian and only a few were made.
Private Plate Abuse - AdrianM
Seen in Swindon yesterday, P15 TOF on a very ordinary looking small hatchback. It was being driven by a mature lady who certainly looked it - which for some reason made it seem all the funnier.
Private Plate Abuse - Badger
The one thing that puzzles me about such plates (particularly given the eye-watering prices asked for some of them) is -- why? OK, so you're called Sue and you're 99, but why should that interest me or anyone else on the road?
Private Plate Abuse - Pugugly {P}
Followed a similar older lady in a hatback on the A470 in South Wales a few moonths ago. V14 GRA.....honest.
Private Plate Abuse - Oz
As per a previous post of mine, I liked WM02ART (music lover or drunk?).
Oz (as was)
Private Plate Abuse - Retro
I own a 3 digit plate that would look even better with a bit of tampering, but I rightly or wrongly thought if you got caught twice with it tampered with you stood the chance of DVLA stealing it from you.
Private Plate Abuse - henry k
The smallest least obvious change I have seen is on a big MB near me. It is WWW.1 where the dot is a little larger than the usual fixing screw. I guess he could still be asked to change it.
Private Plate Abuse - tack
I have no objection to those who wish to buy and use a cherished plate, something like "ALF1" or whatever. The ones who use studs or overt re-positioning of letters to form something remotely resembling SUE (5UE) etc need a visit from the style police, not a nicking from the bill (8ILL)
Private Plate Abuse - v8man
Try being a motorcyclist with a small or altered plate. The rozzers soon have you! Car drivers get away with murder concerning mods to plates or the car.
--
\"Nothing less than 8 cylinders will do\"
Private Plate Abuse - barneybee
Seen in Swindon yesterday, P15 TOF on a very ordinary
looking small hatchback. It was being driven by a mature
lady who certainly looked it - which for some reason made
it seem all the funnier.


I think I saw this plate about 4 years ago and remember thinking it was quite clever. The plate used to be on a bright yellow cinquento and is now on a gold VW Golf. The plate also states 'wife's car my plate'. It's been the same owner in all the, I'm sure it used to be spaced P15T 0F, perhaps the law have had a word.
Private Plate Abuse - frazerjp
Here is a good one near me in High Wycombe: K 9 DDG on a Nissan Serena, the owner being a Doggy parlour!
Private Plate Abuse - Buster Cambelt
The original K9 DOG and also K9 WUF are on a pair of Mazdas (his and hers I guess) seen running around South Wiltshire.
Private Plate Abuse - BrianW
I used to see T2 TEE or TEE 2T (can't recall which) : obviously a golf fanatic.

And COO 1 with the mane of a pigeon fanciers club beneath.
Private Plate Abuse - john deacon
i dont see why we dont do what new zealand does and just let people choose any combination of letters and numbers not already issued
Private Plate Abuse - henry k
From Autocar ads this week.

V 11 DKA £offers (serious) and even the photo of the front of a.....BMW.

E 8 OLA and was even spelt out E BOLA. Who would want to get caught with that?

One of the road tested BMW cars had ALP 117 A with a distorted 7
Private Plate Abuse - Pete M
John, you are quite right. When living in the UK, I couldn't see why it was so important to know when the car was first registered. Did the motor industry have some influence on the registration plate format? Did they somehow know that plate-snobbery would make them millions of pounds? As for the police needing to know the age of the car or where it was first registered, well, I suppose if you never move more than ten miles from where you were born, it might be of use.
Back here now in New Zealand, we seem to have missed out on the joys of plate-snobbery, cloning, mis-spacing of letters and strange fonts. When people started requesting certain plates as they were issued in the normal sequence, the government put the supply of personalised plates up for tender. A company won the tender and for the past several years have been administering the sale of the plates. They are stamped from aluminium sheet and are reflectorised. You can't just get someone to make a plate up for you, so that stops cloning. You can request a variation in spacing when you order the plate, but certain rules apply. You can't have any offensive or excessively suggestive plates, though I've seen a few that were quite close to the edge. When you buy a plate, you supply your vehicle details and the registration information is changed for you. You then post back your old plates in the reply paid envelope and they are destroyed. There are a number of variations, such as Euro style plates, or ones with red lettering, or messages, or coloured borders, or regional alliegances.
There doesn't seem to be any reason why this system couldn't work in the UK. If a certain Janet wanted a personalised plate, then, if it was available, she could have JANET, and if that wasn't available perhaps J4NET, or JAN3T or whatever. With the rise in in-car police data terminals, and the number of EU vehicles on UK roads, what possible point is there in restricting registration marks to a rigid format?
Private Plate Abuse - Pete M
Sorry to follow up my own post, but the following link gives some history of NZ plates. There's even a chart to show the year plates were issued, though we've never had an explicit character linked to the issue date.
www.ltsa.govt.nz/fascinating-facts/motor-vehicle-r...l

It shows that a personalised plate system can run quite happily alongside the normal registration plate organisation.

PM
Private Plate Abuse - cub leader
have just spent a while looking at getting my private plate made up( 21st present from parents) andd found a few other bits and pieces that are illegal and are yet still being made. For instance logos on the end of number plates apart from flags are illegal, cant see a particular reason for this anybody any ideas.
--
Im a student ive got time!!!
Private Plate Abuse - Pigboy
Early 80's black capri in Val D'isere DO U 69, i wonder if thats allowed these days?
Private Plate Abuse - henry k
T11RDO on a 911. That must raise a few comments.
Private Plate Abuse - Happy Blue!
There is a housewear manufacturer near us making bed linen amongst other things. His reg is D11 VET. Just think where the black screw is.. Very clever!
--
Espada III - well if you have a family and need a Lamborghini, what else do you drive?
Private Plate Abuse - AngryJonny
Best one I ever heard of was

NEI410S

Somehow spaced so it read:

N E 1 4 10 S

...though I never saw it myself.
Private Plate Abuse - THe Growler
What has always struck me as the direct cause of this nonsense is the silly UK numbering system.

Wouldn't any of this be avoided if you could, as you can in the US and other countries, just get yourself a set of letters spelling out what it is you want.

My favorite has always been one I saw in Canada on a Porsche Boxster: WAS HIS.

But then I suppose some sour old UK prune-faced killjoy would have a reason why not......


Private Plate Abuse - Collos25
The punishment for this offence is quite steep £2000 fine and the possibility of having the car deregistered never to run again.Yet the police have absolutly no interest what a money earner they are missing.
Private Plate Abuse - AngryJonny
I'd imagine there's a fair amount of paperwork involved.
Private Plate Abuse - barneybee
I had a private plate and had it illegally spaced. Never got stopped despite being followed by the police loads of times. I just made sure it was the standard font. I sold it with the car, legally spaced and the guy who bought keeps it that way.

I say each to their own, unless it's ridiculously mis-represented.
Private Plate Abuse - Happy Blue!
Took me five minutes to work it out!
--
Espada III - well if you have a family and need a Lamborghini, what else do you drive?
Private Plate Abuse - Hoseman
The best plate I have seen is H 2 EAU This was on a large Daimler limosine ( Northumbrian Water was bought out by a French company)
Private Plate Abuse - borasport20
If you go to a shop, you are supposed to prove all sorts of id and vehicle ownership to get a numberplate made. The same is true of buying over the net, but a number of vendors offer 'show plates' for off road use, which require nothing other than payment and the unlikely risk of getting nicked.

I can only assume that the following two cars that i've seen in the last week or two were 'show plates', as the AA car check site cannot recognise either :-

on something flash and shiny, P 155 OFF
and on a rover 45
TW 02 BAD


Private Plate Abuse - Adam {P}
Hey Mike - have you seen EMAIL or EM4IL or some variant of it on that Lexus GS300. Was last seen knocking around St Helens town centre a year or too ago.

Well I thought it was pretty cool...
--
Adam
Private Plate Abuse - Adam {P}
Plus, something like SIIOGUN on, oddly enough, a Ford Fiesta - kidding - it was on a Shogun.

Seen, today. Also in St Helens.
--
Adam
Private Plate Abuse - AngryJonny
on something flash and shiny, P 155 OFF


I had a housemate who enquired to the DVLA about the availability of that exact plate. Apparently they said they had not and would not ever register it.
Private Plate Abuse - borasport20
Which is why I think it was probably a 'show plate'.

I can't understand why someone feels the need to do that - presumably the driver (I hope) would never consider walking down the street muttering those words to every passer by ?


Private Plate Abuse - IanJohnson
seen IIRC on an S80 yesterday evening 11RC.
Private Plate Abuse - Buster Cambelt
I used to see an old S-class Merc now and again with OBO110X
Private Plate Abuse - Dynamic Dave
This thread has started desending to a level inapropriate to the BackRoom standard that we like to maintain.

Enough of the more risqué number plates please.

DD.
Private Plate Abuse - Stonk
Bright yellow lambo with PO5ER (with rounded off 5). I read it as something else though but that's probably something to do with jealousy!
If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
Private Plate Abuse - Stonk
Aww cumon DD. It's real world out there & this thread is on about how people get away with it!
If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
Private Plate Abuse - Stonk
blast that sig...now removed.
Private Plate Abuse - Dynamic Dave
Aww cumon DD. It's real world out there & this thread is on about how people get away with it!


As I said earlier, this site likes to keep to a certain standard. By posting some of the more risqué number plates, lowers that standard. People can get away with it in the real world if they like, but not here please.

DD.
Private Plate Abuse - BobbyG
I may get some stick for saying this but as far as I am aware, the rules on number plates spacing and sizing are very clear and easy to understand.

So ...wait for it.... why not give the power to traffic wardens to issue fixed penalty notices to any cars displaying illegal plates.

Now ducks for cover.......
Private Plate Abuse - PhilW
Aren't some of these supposedly seen plates impossible? I thought that they refused to issue ones that could be seen as obscene and that they avoided the use of O (letter O) because of its possible confusion with 0 (zero), same with I and 1? Mind you , North Riding plates were often OPY but where had a 3 letter plate ending in O followed by numbers? I stand corrected if I am wrong.
Private Plate Abuse - smilingvulture
B7 TCH yours for only £19-500
Private Plate Abuse - L'escargot
Every number plate I own is cherished. Possessing it means I still have the capability to, can still afford to and am still allowed to drive!
--
L\'escargot.
Private Plate Abuse - tack
I think that altering a plate to look as if it is spelling your name (through spacing/judicious placing of rivets etc) looks as cheap as a fake Channel handbag.

If you are going to plate up with your name, save up for the real thing. Or, change your name to LM52YCZ or whatever!
Private Plate Abuse - AngryJonny
The worst one I ever saw was KENEY in my local village. I spent weeks wondering how they did it before I looked a little closer and saw that it was K8NEY with some well-placed studs.


PS - I've only just realised E34KID is very much registration friendly. I'll have to save up.
----
Life is complex; it has real and imaginary parts.
Private Plate Abuse - Mondaywoe
I agree that in general these personalised number plates do little more than identify the driver as a prat, but recently I've noticed a worrying trend towards fitting school buses with personalised plates - obviously to conceal the real age of the things and not worry parents that their little darlings might end up in a ditch!

Graeme