Many years ago I hit a bird in my Standard Super Ten (so I couldn't have been doing much above 50). It went into the screen in the bottom RH corner. Both the doors on that side always rubbed the frame after.

A blackbird smashed the headlamp glass in an 1100 a few years later.

New Years Day 2001, doing 85 on a deserted A14. Company Audi A6, 11 months old.

Pheasant wandered out from verge, started to cross carriageway, saw me, and then ran towards me.

Impact was right on front grill, I think he must have jumped up just before impact.

Demolished grill, A/C unit and needed new bonnet! The poor bird was stuck fast with its rear sticking out the grill all the way to Peterborough. The smell was fairly unpleasant too.

About 10 years ago I was out on my TL1000 bike doing a good speed ( i'll say no more).

Pheasant apeared over the hedge at head height on a collision course. Had about a second to duck down as much as possible, the bird hit & completely broke the screen, no damage to me luckily.

Then a few years later another pheasant had an argument with my sturdy motorcycle boot at speed on the A5 in Wales.

A few years ago I was on an unlit section of the M11 in the outside lane, heavy rush hour traffic & heavy rain doing about 60. A fox suddenly appeared in the headlights at the edge of the hard shoulder. It just took off straight into the side of my Passat, took off a bit of plastic trim then went under the nearside rear wheel. Did no other damage to the car fortunately.

In the Uk I hit a pheasant in a Volvo 740 and smashed a headlamp.

A schoolfriend was driving in Scotland with three friends at night. They hit a deer at 70 mph. 3 Dead.

I narrowly missed an elephant in Masai Mara in RSA which charged at me in a Mercedes : I risked breaking the suspension and sump by driving along a dried up riverbed to avoid her. Her trunk failed to remove the rear door whose handle she caught (she had a young calf).

I've run over several wabbits in the Uk , a snake in RSA and missed several monkeys by very little there.

In safari parks, I am empted to run over monkeys but restrain myself :-)

Edited by madf on 31/01/2013 at 15:38

an elephant in Masai Mara in RSA which charged at me in a Mercedes

How did they get an elephant into the Mercedes ?

In a case.

I have seen a bird explode - on holiday as a child, dad hit some sort of large bird on the motorway with our Volvo 340. It looked like a sort of firework of feathers and guts. No damage to the tank...Volvo.

A colleague of mine chose to hit a tree instead of a deer - reading some of your stories, she probably made the right choice.

In the deer case I mentioned, they hit it full on, it rose over the bonnet and entered the car via the windscreen. It was a stag with antlers as well... :-(

I have seen a bird explode

A friend of mine was brought up in London's East End - as a kid they used to feed the seagulls bread spiced with baking powder - and take great delight at watching them explode as they flew away !!

They don't explode, as such, but pigeons cannot pass any digestive gases so it's bad for them.....seagulls will just vomit the Alka Seltzer back up.

To really explode a bird, you need to use calcium (di)carbide (Oh, CaC!) Apparently. Or magnesium silicide (then you get silane!)

Edited by Bobbin Threadbare on 31/01/2013 at 18:55

I once saw a springer spaniel hit by a Reliant. The dog ran off (no owner to be seen) while the Reliant was left with bits of fibre-glass over the road. I felt quite sorry for the driver.

Guy who lived in this village at the time had a pheasant fly into his leg while motorcycling. Leg had to be amputated below the knee. Made a decent recovery and got around pretty well with a prosthesis.

He was a stalwart of the Am Dram society and one year played the villain in the panto. Plot required kids to kick him in the shin whicgh they did with relish!!