Mine are:-
1) People that take 100's of pictures but forget the inside of it, I always like to see the interior as this gives a very good indication of how well it has been cared for.
2) People that blank out the number plate - what are you trying to hide?
3) People who put SOLD AS SEEN - Again it just implies they are selling a car which they know has faults.
4) People that say no time wasters - how do I know, you could be wasting me time I won't know until I see the car.
5) People asking full price for a car with a short MOT, if you know the car is good stick 12 months MOT on it.
6) People that reply to any faults you point out "they won't be anything wrong with it, it has just passed the MOT".
7) People that describe the car has exellent condition, you get there to find holes in the parcel shelf, rust on the sills etc.
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Blanking out your number plate is a sensible decision. Chances of it being cloned may be remote, but it does happen.
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but could you not get this information just by looking at any car in the street? Take down the number plate, engine size, trim level etc?
It is a good thought though, so I won't automatically assume cars with a blanked number plate is dodgy now. I thought it was because they didn't want anybody finding out where they lived or the police spotting it etc.
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People who write in the headline "Daimler Super V8" and underneath in small text "Note this is not the supercharged version but is still a fast car"
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I have the reverse problem -- I'm too honest, and have talked myself out of hundreds of pounds in the past.
All the TV shows point out that you should never mention faults unless you are explicitly asked -- I just don't have the brass neck to do it.
One guy commented on a Sunny I was selling; "this car is in better nick than most I've seen -- and you describe it as being in 'fair' condition?". D'oh.
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There was a Volvo S40 T4 for sale around the corner - it said on the ad "this is not a Grandad car" which was fair enough really - it is a Q car and looks pretty dull in solid blue.
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Hiding the badges (or not taking clear enough photos of the rear) so you can't tell what spec it is.
Luke.
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Luke that is another problem, especialy with Fiestas as with colour coded bumpers they look the same, with other cars I just don't know enough about them to know the spec by the trim.
Another one is just now I rang a private seller up about a car I say "hiya is the car still for sale", he says "which one?", I ask what did he mean, "he said well I have four cars for sale" I just said in that case I am not interested.
I am also very honest, if I was to sell my dads car I would mention the clutch cylinder leak, now most buyers but never spot it, but it would not be fair to sell a car that needs a £200 job doing to it.
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>>4) People that say no time wasters -
I would not view a car where the advertiser included the above - nor would I be interested in seeing one being sold privately and described as ?on a 51 plate, on a 56 plate' etc.
Sounds too dealer(ish) to me.
Clk Sec
Edited by Clk Sec on 19/10/2008 at 14:47
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'Genuine Reason for Sale'
.....................of course there is ! I want the money or don't want to spend £0000's in looming repairs.
Ian
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Rattle
Just ring up a Ford dealer with the registration plate or VIN and they should be able to tell you the trim level, engine and build date.
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One thing that really annoys moi is when someone says "average miles for year", now we all know its gorn round the clock a few times so why not just come clean and say 230k miles or whatever.
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>>230k miles or whatever.
A fair description for a 20 year old car...
Clk Sec
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People who write descriptions in a mixture of text speak and swahili and can't even spell the car manufacturer correctly:
tinyurl.com/629szm
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People who write descriptions in a mixture of text speak and swahili and can't even spell the car manufacturer correctly: tinyurl.com/629szm
I wouldn't want that BWM :D mainly due to the fact that it's been chavved up to snip)
It may only be a 3cc, but at least it's got ABS (and he can spell that).
Luke.
Edited by Pugugly on 19/10/2008 at 17:37
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Obviously an out of work copy writer for a well known broadsheet.
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Luke that is another problem especialy with Fiestas as with colour coded bumpers they look the same with other cars I just don't know enough about them to know the spec by the trim.
Well, there's this one (tinyurl.com/3nv7ps) I'm considering looking at but the price is too much imo even though it's well looked after it's a basic spec, high price due to the fact he mentions the hifi and speakers.
My friend thinks it's been suped up as there are no badges on the back and there is a chrome end on the exhaust (I didn't really notice that until it was pointed out).
Another one is just now I rang a private seller up about a car I say "hiya is the car still for sale" he says "which one?" I ask what did he mean "he said well I have four cars for sale" I just said in that case I am not interested.
Yeah, had that too; if they can't be honest about that then no thanks.
I am also very honest if I was to sell my dads car I would mention the clutch cylinder leak now most buyers but never spot it but it would not be fair to sell a car that needs a £200 job doing to it.
True, but some people just think that they will automatically get back what they've put into it, that's not the case. Just like the one I saw the other day, massive rust spots that have either come through or have been filled, really bad, worst I've seen.
Luke.
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Another vote for "No time wasters".
I've had enough of my time wasted going to see sheds that have been described as immaculate.
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Guy I know placed a successful ad in our local paper a while back. Successful in so far as it sold his car for him within 24 hrs.. It went something like this........
Ford Mondeo Hatchback 1.8 petrol
10 years old
120 thousand miles
Has been regularly serviced ( well, while I've had it anyway )
10 month's MOT
3 month's tax
Looks worth £800 which is why I'm asking £800. If £800 is your budget this will not disappoint.
Everything which should work works, everything which should be solid is solid.
If you expect it to look like new you will be disappointed
Call me on **** ****** for more details.
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People who describe a car that is in near scrapyard condition as being " their beloved ( insert your own silly nickname here ) which has been in the family for years ", during which time it has been allowed to deteriorate to the above mentioned condition and then use the expression " Got to get rid of "
Rgds.
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The car is in MINT condition.
My interpretation of MINT is showroom/concourse. Other people do not seem to have such exacting standards.
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The car is in MINT condition.
yup... its like a polo mint - has a hole in the middle!
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If I'm are looking at a car sub-£1000, I ignore all that waffle anyway. I want to know only the following collection of facts:
1) Does it start first time, is the engine/transmission noisy, do all the essential electrics work.
2) Does it have four good tyres -- make unimportant, I just want to see decent tread and general condition on all of them.
3) Is there any rust, or dents that might affect the structure.
4) Does it have a recent service record -- does it look as if it is well looked after, is the oil clean etc.
5) Do the brakes/steering/clutch/gears/lights work well.
The rest of it -- is it clean, does it have the toys/leather etc, badge, engine size etc etc are a complete irrelevance to me.
If you want a car to look cool in, don't spend £700 on it.
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Quite agree Jase. In fact I would be a bit suspicious of a sub-£1k car which didn't look a bit lived in. Bit like an old person with a face lift and a wig. Just doesn't look right somehow.
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You can add to your list:
"First to see will buy"
Cars described as "she"
Adverts placed in the sub-£1000 section of Autotrader (is it cheaper?) for, say, £899 which then go on to read, "actual price is £1899".....
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One careful owner (*Do people still try that on?*)
One lady owner (*Do people still try that on?*)
Owned by a vicar (*Do people still try that on?*)
Full service history (*except for 11 missing years*)
Genuine reason for sale (*It's been flogged to death, the cat's not long for this world and I want rid of it like a bad dose of the pox*)
(My all time favourite - "Good LOCAL CAR" (i.e. it's been over every local pothole, speed hump and manhole cover at 87 mph but at least no more than 60 miles from home...)
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The problem is for many people i.le young male drivers living in the car crime capital of the country insurance is a major major issues, large engined cars are just too expensive to insure. Thats why people like me have to look at smaller cars.
I really do hate first to see will buy too.
I feel from the advice I have got from the two threads I have made that I am a bit clearer on what I want now.
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A friend of mine once bought a car "one lady owner" the advert said - Turns out it was Laura Ashley Ltd !
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>>Owned by a vicar (*Do people still try that on?*)
It happened to me. I 'phoned him to check the provenance. He was now a bishop!
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Did it have a rev counter ?
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Had it had any altar..ations ? Was he font of it ? Did it re..choir any work ? Or just a ahem .....service....?
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I see the 'hilarious puns' have stopped now the SWMBOs have finished watching Heartbeat!
Edit: Thought I better put a smiley on that! :>)
Edited by bathtub tom on 20/10/2008 at 00:58
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>Did it have a rev counter ? <
Best laugh I had in weeks on this site, PU - keep them coming ...
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7) People that describe the car has exellent condition you get there to find holes in the parcel shelf rust on the sills etc.
Yep - been there done that - "a bit of rust on the rear wheel arch" meaning "what's left of the rear wheel arch has some rust on it".
My real hate is "fully loaded" - what a pathetic phrase! I wouldn't get out of bed to look at a car described as that!
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".....full MoT" what the heck does that mean ?
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"Four new tyres!" (= With an absolute heap of carp sitting on them!!) Ditto: "new clutch" (owner used left pedal as footrest) / "average condition for age" (=the great great grandfather of Ford Escorts)
Another meaningless platitude: "DRIVES WELL" (As opposed to a car which, erm...... ? ?)
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"No offers".
Where's the fun in that?
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"No tyre kickers" or more common in the motorcycle world "no test pilots"
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"First to see will buy"; that statement is downright arrogant IMO.
"One lady owner"; with great respect to the ladies on here, that is not a recommendation. My current missus and my ex both use their cars as skips, the ex's doubling as a fairground dodgem which never actually hit anything; it was always hit BY something else, often an immovable object like my new fence! And for people who are highly pernickety about their own personal hygeine, the fairer sex seem markedly reluctant to keep their cars clean.
Tin hat on, sheltering in trench awaiting incoming............ ;-)
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I'm selling my Honda at the moment (not too much success either) and finally lost my rag on the phone yesterday after a continual series of calls and emails from Nigerian fraudsters and companies offering to put me in touch with potential buyers.
I was deeply and refreshingly offensive to the Nigerian when he called, and had a major rant to the call centre operative. No, I won't take a cheque and pay your blasted "shipper" his fee in cash when he comes to collect the car. I replied to one email and told him the car was for sale for £12400, not £2400, and he replied instantly offering the full price.
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No Harleyman, I'm with you there.
Visiting one of my daughters today, she asked me to service he Micra. I gave up reminding them. She lives fifty-odd miles away, and a she's visiting for the day soon, she thought I 'could fit it in'.
I pulled the dip-stick, and admired the treacle on it.
The other one bought a brand new MX5 five years ago. The dealer seviced it once, after a couple of years. I got my hands on it a couple of years later. That's it!
And don't get me started on people who ask 'have you got a puncture?' when I insist on checking my tyre pressures more than once a lifetime.
Edited by bathtub tom on 20/10/2008 at 01:39
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I remember many moons ago that a car might be described as being well shod. This generally meant that a potential buyer could expect to see some evidence of tyre tread. The spare, of course, would be as bald as a badger.
Clk Sec
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Comments on Clk Sec's post at 07:22.......
All the badgers that I can see walking around in my garden any evening are not bald!
I only see baldness when I look in the mirror.
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And don't get me started on people who ask 'have you got a puncture?' when I insist on checking my tyre pressures more than once a lifetime.
I can gaurantee if someone walks past when I am checking the oil they will say, "Trouble?"
Seeing anyone with a bonnet open nowdays is a very rare sight.
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In describing the condition of a car, has "shed" now replaced "dog" and "nail" ?
screwtape
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I so wanted to respond to this, but all the best comments have been posted. So sorry if it's too late, or duplicated but :-
1) first to see will buy :- no point in phoning then - it's already gone,
2) no interior pics :- hey - i have got to sit on that seat
3) showroom condition :- it's brand new then ?
4) £zillion - no offers :- sorry - it's a lump of metal, and it has a market value, no matter how many times you have polished it, or how much you ( or i ) love it.
5) no offers ;- ok 'bye .....
6) immaculate ( see 3 ) :- apart from the scratches, dints, (supermarket car parks, which dont count) coffee / cola stains, size 1 footprints on the seat backs ............. i am bored now i have already gone ....
7) number plate hidden :- can't do an hpi check, n cant check value ( eg. '54 '05 '55 - all 2005, but likely £600 difference front to back, so i have to phone you at the premium rate number to find out that i am not interested
8) pics of engine :- i was hoping it would have one
9) pics of speedo :- oh good - i thought you were lying !
10) pics of docs :- show me when i come to see the car - i can't see the details on the 'net anyway.
11) there is no 11 - i have already moved on ....
well, - tell me its a wreck, - price it fairly and if i phone u , i am probably still interested.
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Kia Cerato for sale - NOT VW Golf, Ford Focus, Vauxhall Astra.
Feeble attempt to snare people searcing for a specific model other than the one you're trying to sell.
OOOOOO, I really wanted a Golf, but hang on, that 1988 Hyundai Pony NOT VW Golf looks interesting...
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'Good for year' cheeses me off, especially with a very old car. The fact that it still exists makes it that.
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How about this then if you prefer the truth.........
Fordhall Hatchular 1998
1.6
MOT Yes some
Tax Yes just
Mileage - fairly monstrous
Owners - Yes
Condition - It's ten years old, fairly knackered and I've got fed up with spending money on it. However, given that most things which might have needed to be replaced have been during my sorry two years with it, it might just be OK for a while now. Tyres are OK too.
Despite all that it is probably worth about £300. Therefore I have advertised it at £400 on the assumption that someone might offer me £250 and I will then pretend to reluctantly accept £275.
Call me on 1234567
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Some of my favourites from my Fiesta hunting nightmare of a couple of years ago:
"Full service history" - 84,000 mile car with two stamps, no invoices, filthy, "below min" oil, and 'my mate dunnit since, innit' from the seller.
"1.4 Ghia" - after driving 52 miles to see it, the car was a 1.25. This seller also made it onto my hit list by responding to my annoyance at having driven 52 miles to see a car I didn't want with "Goes well though. I got 125 out of it.".
"Metallic red" - car was flat red. In a non-photo ad obviously.
"Power steering" - no it wasn't!
"ABS" - no it wasn't!
"Climate control" - a heater temperature control dial in other words.
It's really annoying and frustrating, but it makes it all the more sweet when you find the genuine car from the genuine seller who has described it accurately.
Cheers
DP
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On ebay - "advertised elsewhere so I reserve the right to end the auction early."
So if the price doesnt get as high as hoped, you pull the plug and disappoint someone; so whats the point in bidding?
Cars mis-described, I actually saw on eBay:
"Saab 9-3 TiD S - sport model, top of the range". No "S" does not stand for sport, it is just the trim level below SE. And its one up from the bottom of the range.
I once went to look at a car that had been described as in good condition. Made an appointment to view but when I got there I was staggered - the back seat was covered in straw and dog hairs. Under the bonnet the engine was filthy (with dirt not oil, plus more straw), and a cover was missing from the top of the MAF sensor, allowing dirt and dust inside for who knows how long.
It drove well on the test drive but when I told him I wasn't interested, he got a bit shirty and upset that I didnt want it.
Edited by Rich 9-3 on 21/10/2008 at 14:03
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directors car
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It's funny that carriers of "Show dogs in transit" don't seem so keen to advertise the fact when selling the car. "Interior ripped to pieces" ought to go down well.
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"lady owner(s)"
Sexist and rubbish to boot.
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Once owned a escort 1.8si. and years after selling it fancied another one....
saw an ideal advert on ebay....
1 woman owner.
fsh.
as new condition
28,000 + good tyres.
etc etc.....sounded good, even said stone chips had been touched up....
.
all i thought added up to a car that had been looked after...
I drove from north oxfordshire to Bath....
even looking at the car with a torch...it was after work....
the "touched up stone chips" had it seemed, included all the bumpers and under and over the door rubbing strips...the paint had been applied with a can and full of runs and air bubbles.
the "as new condition" didn't seem to apply to the deep scratches in the dash and interior trim.the tyres where all on the 1.6mm minimum and cracked all round the side walls..
and as for the service history....it had been serviced every 10k rather than every 12months.....so its had often gone years....without a service...
i ran////away from that deal....what a flippin shed....i couldn't believe bidding went up to 2k......may-be the buyer didn't pay up when he saw the car....
.
but on the other side of the story,,,,went and saw a s40 volvo in shirley (brum) and it was perfect and had a well written sales blurb, did the deal then and there, and the sellers where really pleased as they had been told not to sell a car on ebay because of the people who put in silly bids and don't turn up.....
theres some honest people out there....its just finding them!
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It makes me laugh when someone is selling a car at well above market value "Because I've had to spend so much on it I want my money back".
Like that's going to make anyone buy it.
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Similar to RR's example, there are also those irritating people who seem to think that a modded 10 year old Saxos or Corsa is worth somewhere close to the value of the mods put into it.
They might well have spent ten grand on it, but the harsh truth is that a decade old Saxo is worth £500, not the £5,000 they're asking. Worth a reasonable sum in parts, but near worthless as a complete car.
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My three favourite (tongue in cheek) private buying experiences (of many):
1) Turned up at a nice sub-urban house to look at a Citroën BX. Ad seemed genuine and all that. Got there and the car wasn't on site and we needed to be drove to a lock-up a couple of miles away, not a good start. Turned out the BX was a company hack for an accountancy firm and the hapless director had managed to "lose" the V5 _and_ MOT. It also belched out huge clouds of white smoke, had mayo under the oil filler cap and sounded like a bag of nails. Needless to say, I didn't buy it! Chap couldn't understand why...
2) Went to a lovely house in the country to see a VW Golf. Supposed FSH turned out to be the last MOT and a receipt for a new tyre - the oil was black and sludgy. Car was badly scratched down both sides and the "good condition" interior looked like it had been used for transporting bundles of barbed wire. Needless to say, I didn't buy it! The "1 lady owner" still didn't seem to understand what FSH meant, even after two attempts to explain it.
3) Looked at a Mondeo V6. Unusually rusty for a Mondeo at the time (only 4 years old) - that was "exl cond", apparently. Things went from bad to worse when the car wouldn't start and the owner had to borrow the battery from his other car to get the Mondy started. It sounded like it was running on only 4 or 5 of its 6 cylinders. I was so spooked I almost literally ran off... Needles to say, I didn't buy it. Owner thought it was "perfect"...
Most hated thing about ads in general? "Average mileage for age" Why don't people just state the mileage instead of hoping you won't notice or care when it turns out to be 178k on the clock and you've wasted a phone call or visit in person on them?
I've found that you know you're on to a good one when the owner wants to really talk to you about the car and does so almost lovingly, so that you can hear the regret in their voice over selling it.
Edited by TheOilBurner on 21/10/2008 at 16:10
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A very time ago I went to look at a Fiat Panda. The owner turned out to be a trader working from a large run down house in the middle of nowhere, guarded by huge feral dogs. He saw me arrive, otherwise I probably would have run a mile, greeted me in a neanderthal sort of way and guided me to the side of the house where the car was standing.
The car itself was actually in good condition and better than any I'd seen until then, though with Pandas that's probably not saying much.
I asked about a test drive. "No problem", he said, handing me the keys.
"Am I insured?" I asked.
"Of course you're not", he answered, "so you'd better not pink fluffy dice crash it."
I left hurriedly.
Edited by Webmaster on 22/10/2008 at 01:39
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Phrases I dislike:
Good condition for age.
Lady owner
Any modifications of any sort.
Service history. (Subtle cos that means it was serviced up to 40k miles and never again - and is now at 80k).
ANY list of work needing to be done: owners can't be bothered to maintain it so it WILL be a shed.
SORN... why bother ? Get it running first.
I don't mind the odd rust spot... as long as it is not "immaculate".
Anyone want to but a Peugoet 106 on family owner, immaculate, MOT till October 2008, no tax, needs alittle work, a lovely runner, starts first time, only 2 million miles from new , good tyes - at least 1mm on 1 side of each, new exhaust and battery (5 years ago) and only smoked in by a 100 a day smoker?
On the other hand when looking for low mileage 106s for older son, I found 3 which were over 6 years old, under 30k miles, FSH and immaculate apart from minor trim - like the strings holding up the rear hatch cover were missing. Restores your faith in human nature. All were well over book price ... but all were very nice indeed. We eneded up buying the cheapest which has done 10k miles in 6 mnths with no problems...
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I love it when the seller says, "I'll bring it round to your place" like he's doing me a favour. And, "don't come round to mine, me dad's ill and he don't want disturbin' ".
These guys now have a separate pay as you go for each car they have stuck on the verge, so that they don't have to ask "which car do you mean?" Except the really thick ones of course.
There's one near me with a few cars outside his house, all the grass churned up, with proper dealer-type plastic price tags hanging off the rear-view mirrors! Don't trading standards have some kind of duty to eradicate these rogues, or are they too busy taking imperial scales off market traders?
It's tempting to ring him up and ask if he's a dealer and see what kind of evasion tactics he uses.
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I always like "One careful owner" which I take to mean :
"there was a careful owner, once, and 4+ owners who didn't give a &!£*"
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I find it amusing when private sellers put an ad in the window of their car that states the make and model. I can find out the make and model simply by looking at the car!
In a similar vein, I really despise those private sellers who simply put a sign in the window saying 'For Sale' and giving a phone number. No mileage, no service information, no price? No thanks!
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In support of the "no time wasters" listings.
There is nothing worse than someone ringing up and wanting to come round and view. Time and date agreed. You spend several hours cleaning it inside and out and they don't bother to come. A time waster. And there are many out there, believe me, that have little or no social lives.
Blanking out number plates.Its done in the trade for transporting vehicles as well. Cloning will be simpler if the photo in the ad has the correct level of trim and colour to match the stolen car as well as the reg. number.
I was aware stating "sold as seen" was a legal statement that the onus is on the buyer and has no comeback when it comes to any future problem with the car.Once its gone its gone.
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I went to see a Volvo that was being sold for parts , in Saaf East London. Turns out the car was a couple of miles away from the vendor's council house, so we got in my car and drove there.
I'm chatting to the chavendor as I'm driving, glance across , and saw just sticking out of his camouflage jacket the handle of a really meaty machete...
the car was possibly stolen , but I drove away with the required parts.....
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a little off topic but tv adverts for cars get my goat up, they always show all the bells and whistles but never seem to mention that these are all extras and will cost you an arm and leg, the new tiguan for instance shows the car parallel parking itself (btw how cool is that) but that will cost you an extra £500 which they convienently forget to mention in the advert
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by required parts do you mean the ones you wanted or the ones you felt would be required to buy in order not to be chopped into tiny pieces :-)
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in defence - I had a range rover which I couldn't shift. So I put a big sign up with "for sale" and the number, which you could read from a long way away. Loads of calls, and a quick sale. The sheets of A4 you see in people's rear passenger window with a load of guff in 12 point type are pretty useless for people going past at 30 mph!
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I am bored and this is my experience from car hunting - it is partly true and partly tongue in cheek.
Lots of money spent - I have spent £1000 on repairing this car already and now I have discovered the slave cylinder is leaking so it has to go.
Runs well - Camshaft is warn to bits but not miss firing yet.
Lots of MOT - 5 months and I got 10 advisories last time I have not bothered to fix.
Service history - My son is good and forging stamps.
Good condition for year - Wings have rust holes in them but what do you expect on a 5 year old car?
Low milleage - Has got 130,000 on the cluck but I took 100,000 of for good measure.
New tyres - Had four new remoulds 20,000 miles ago but still have 1.7mm of thread so legal.
Recently serviced - Never bothered servicing but the oil was black so though I best change it before selling it.
One lady owner - Bonnet has never opened for the past 10,000 miles, lots of parking scrapes. (sorry girls!).
Very quick - I have blown the head gasket when my 1.3 car overheated when doing 120mph on the M6.
Rust free- bodywork fine but chasis is rotting through, that 7" hole always passes the MOT as the inspectors can't see it.
No smoke - Oil additives are wonderful stuff. Who needs piston rings when the oil is so thick it forms a seal!
Family owned - Strong smell of vomit we can't get rid of from the kids, seats warn thin, electric window motors jammed.
HPI clear - The car was involved in a bad ancident but it was not an insurance job and it was repaired so nothing flags up on the DVLA database.
Elderly owner - expect lots of dents and the clutch to be burnt out.
Although a lot of above is tongue and cheek I think there is a lot of truth in the above especialy with regard to HPI, just because its clear it dosn't automatically mean its not been involved in a nasty accident. Also when checking the MOT make sure it has no advisories, I have been stung on this twice now.
moved into your original post on the same subject
Edited by Pugugly on 08/11/2008 at 07:51
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My biggest hate is....
The air con doesn't work but just needs a regas.
No it doesn't it needs hundreds spent on it.
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