My most enduring apprentice popped outside on a visit this warm February weekend. Its been pushing 15c on the south facing micro climate of our drive here in Yorkshire and a plaque of midges joined me in the spring (6 monthly) servicing our two vehicles.
I fished a few out with a screwdriver but then gave up and drank them as they entered the mug, making perfunctory grinding motions with my remaining back teeth.
Small black flies, crawling on my balding head and getting into the paper filter elements as fast as I blew them out.
Said apprentice now almost 20 years in learning from the master, looked at the proffered old air filter element and went back inside with no comment.
I thought things were looking up after 18 years when I was asked `is that a screw`, referring to a bolt I had left on the kitchen table, but to my chagrin, elemental interest proved secondary to its location and theory delivered with enthusiasm to the apprentice has not translated into practice.
There were earlier apprentices many years ago, these were not indentured and tended to be attracted to the master when their own car needed servicing. Often disappearing afterwards, I can still access a long term memory of one approaching me in a smiling multi teeth American sort of way with a can of Duckhams. ;(
In retrospect I think it was the can of Duckhams that caused this memory to endure.
Nature or Nurture? But still no luck in finding a suitable apprentice for role reversal experiences all those years ago and now the enduring apprentice has undergone response habituation to the kitchen bolt leaving me alone outside with the flies.
How`s your `apprentice` ? better luck?
Regards ;)
Edited by oilrag on 10/02/2008 at 20:58
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My current apprentice has mastered the basics quite nicely, and it is very rare for Harleyman's tea level to drop into the red these days.
She has a positive attitude towards doing things for herself, and indeed asked me today to show her how to change the wheel on her Punto. Checks her own tyre pressures and can use the compressor to blow them up if necessary.
There is a downside to this. She also recognises spanners, screwdrivers and other tools as being useful for whatever job she's doing in the kitchen, so I may yet have to padlock me toolbox!
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My apprentice drinks no tea - a female colleague does and keeps me topped up.
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LOL oilrag!
I have to report a total lack of success from my end. In fact the learning curve of my apprentice seems to have not only faltered but fallen into the negative, resembling the trajectory of an Acapulco cliff diver - graceful but steep. I cannot even recall the last time she refuelled her own car. Tis I who performs this monthly task.
She also does not appreciate the finer points of metal fatigue as illustrated by the spectacularly worn out cam shaft (1985 Range Rover) and failed half shaft bearing (1996 Grand Cherokee) I had on display on this very desk. Actually they are still here but cunningly hidden from view by strategically placed heaps of paperwork, tyre catalogues and 10-year old car magazines I have dug up from the cellar.
My attention is now being diverted towards two home grown junior apprentices, the first of which will be turning double figures soon. I have already shown her, in detail, how I replaced the laser pick up assembly in her CD player and various other repairs which were received with interest.
There's hope yet...
Edited by Billy Whizz on 10/02/2008 at 23:55
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My apprentice starts off strongly, but has an attention span problem. Usually it's a friend on the phone, or a "must see" TV programme. Her intentions are great, the delivery often less so.
That said, tea supply is first class, and she can usually be relied upon to pump a brake pedal when I'm bleeding (literally!) or offer constructive advice such as "swearing at it won't help" and "Why does everything you do on a car involve a hammer?" ;-)
Cheers
DP
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I was never going to get my daughter to hold a spanner but she did walk round the elderly car with me when she took delivery of it and promised to check the tyres and levels regularly. Somehow I knew she was just humouring me. I left a post-it note in the manual saying she could claim £20 off me if she ever found the note. My money was quite safe. Now she's living with Boyfriend, she's sold her car and sent me a cheque for £50 towards the tyres I put on the car last summer. Last time she visited, she got her younger bro to change the oil.
Son washes the car regularly and checks levels weekly and tyres monthly. He can be persuaded to change the oil and filters but it takes bloomin' hours. He's got to change, put on some old trainers and a hat and rip my nitrile gloves putting them on. After crashing around the garage for ages looking for tools, he eventually buckles down to it. Then he insists I check the sump plug tightness and leaves the old oil for me to decant into an old can. After the deed is done the clothes have to come off and the lengthy shower/hair-washing ritual begins. Much, much later he makes some oblique comment about old cars needing servicing every 5 minutes. When he did his work experience a few years ago he went to the local Citroen garage and claimed to enjoy most of it except when the mechanics hid his bicycle at home time.
A decent enough chap but as an apprentice; a failure, I fear.
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