The mole grip thread reminded me of the pain of clamping the palm of my in them a time or two. They must be number one in the list of the most painful essentials in the toolkit. Number two has to be the hammer when you missed the chisel end for the second time.
Ouch.
Mike
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and the half inch spanner, which always got worn, which slipped and rounded a nut, normally when your knuckles were already within an inch of something sharp and it was always when your hands were freezing cold.
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Anything with a rachet that doesn't engage positively.
A cheap socket wrench I've got fools you into thinking the rachet has changed from undo to do-up as you feel resistance to movement, but as soon as you apply proper force the rachet slips and you end up punching hard steel or hitting yourself in the head with a wrench (sump plugs, axle fill plugs...).
And blunt knives. They slip and then leave a jagged rough cut. Much better are the razor sharp ones that you don't even notice slice through your hands until blood soaks into your cuffs...
Piers
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what about the spark plug remover, its a long tube with a bar through a hole in the top, EVERY time you use one the little bar in the hole breaks, leaving the tool completely useless, and i thought draper was good.
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agree with you about the spark plug remover cos I drive an oil burner
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Trying to do up a jubilee clip with a flat bladed screwdriver - invariably ends in tears
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I'm happy to see I'm not the only one to have been mangled by the above named tools.
Some of them seem to possess an almost uncanny skill in inflicting pain even when your'e ready for them.
The mole grips are a classic. You know before you start squeezing that theyr'e going to have you!
And why when you drop something heavy does it always have to fall on the tenderest part of your foot.
And only last week the ultimate in self inflicted pain was when I was forcing a tight clip on plastic top on to a can. It clipped on tight with skin from my finger attached. Excruciating pain and knowing its going to get worse when I had to pull it off again. Nice when it stops hurting though!!
Alvin
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Your final sentence reminded me of the 'getting caught in the zip fly' syndrome - you just KNOW how much it's gonna hurt!
(Moral is : don't go Commando)
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Tools to avoid - I saw a set of tools very cheap at the local market.
But I would never trust anything made of "crhome vanadium". :)
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LAS,
Draper tools are rubbish. they don't make them - they just buy any old shi*te and repackage it. It's the sort of stuff you can buy at any boot sale for next to nothing.
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> But I would never trust anything made of "crhome vanadium". :)
When I was working in Thailand, and probably still, there was big business in t-shirts which were copies of famous brands - Coca Cola and the like.
One of the main ones available was "Hard Rock Cafe - Phuket", and aside from any jokes about the pronunciation of Phuket, there wasn't actually a Hard Rock Cafe there.
However, one particularly enterprising Thai, realised that not everybody likes Rock. Therefore, for quite some time, you could buy Hard Pop, Hard Blues, Hard Jazz, Hard Funk etc. cafes.
I have seen people in Australia and England wearing these, and I always wondered if they really thought that Hard Funk Cafe - Phuket etc. actually existed.
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The asian love of (and abuse of) western alphabets is well known - with hilarious consequences. have a look at:
www.engrish.com/apparel.html
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Seen in just one Beirut market: Gavin Klein, Calven Klein, Calvin Cline, Calven Kleen and probably some others. And, is there really a company called Pananasonic? I've seen it so often I am beginning to wonder.
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Terry Maxwell, a tool best avoided !
All IMHO of course!
Fred
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car boot sales often have clarke, old 'snap on' tools, and stanley, for very cheap prices.
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Mike
I agree with your comments about Mole grips, and some of the other Backroomers.
I did, however, find them very useful as temporary clamps when welding. Yes, you knew the Mole was going to bite your palm, but the gas torch was going to get you as well! It was a case of "which didn't hurt most".
Ian
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I always kept this because I found it so funny - hope you all do too...
HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive parts not far from the object we are trying to hit.
MECHANIC'S KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on boxes containing seats and motorcycle jackets.
ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning steel Pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age, but it also works great for drilling mounting holes in fenders just above the brake line that goes to the rear wheel.
PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads.
HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
VISE-GRIPS: Used to round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETELENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your garage on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside a brake drum you're trying to get the bearing race out of.
WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 1/2 socket you've been searching for the last 15 minutes.
DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly painted part you were drying.
WIRE WHEEL: Cleans rust off old bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say, "Ouc...."
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering a motorcycle to the ground after you have installed your new front disk brake setup, trapping the jack handle firmly under the front fender.
EIGHT-FOOT LONG DOUGLAS FIR 2X4: Used for levering a motorcycle upward off a hydraulic jack.
TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.
PHONE: Tool for calling your neighbor to see if he has another hydraulic floor jack.
SNAP-ON GASKET SCRAPER: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool for spreading mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot.
E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool that snaps off in bolt holes and is ten times harder than any known drill bit.
TIMING LIGHT: A stroboscopic instrument for illuminating grease buildup.
TWO-TON HYDRAULIC ENGINE HOIST: A handy tool for testing the tensile strength of ground straps and brake lines you may have forgotten to disconnect.
CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large motor mount prying tool that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end without the handle.
BATTERY ELECTROLYTE TESTER: A handy tool for transferring sulfuric acid from a car battery to the inside of your toolbox after determining that your battery is dead as a doornail, just as you thought.
AVIATION METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.
TROUBLE LIGHT: The mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which is not otherwise found under motorcycles at night. Health benefits aside, it's main purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that 105-mm howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of the Battle of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.
PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; can also be used, as the name implies, to round off Phillips screw heads.
AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burning power plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts last tightened 40 years ago by someone in Sindelfingen, and rounds them off.
PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.
HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to cut hoses 1/2 inch too short.
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Dan,
I'm a hardened chap when it comes to the office/e-mail joke sheet. "Yeah right" is the best I can usually do when presented with the *funniest* thing around.
Now that one made me smile....very slightly.
"Tools to avoid". I've avoided posting on this thread but was thinking along the same lines as Fred.
As to real tools to avoid. I do avoid them or at least have stopped being bitten. After the first ten years of creeping back to the house looking for a plaster and sympathy you learn.....don't you?
David
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Thank you,Dan J,an extremely amusing antidote to the tedious rantings of people like me.
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