May I nominate the Kia Picanto? Aside from having one of the currently fashionably stupid and meaningless names dreamed up by marketing pimples over expense account lunches, it looks like it was put together from the leftovers on the production line after the assembly crew had gone home. Ugliness elevated to an art form. Growlette calls it the Placenta, with the obvious connotations of what happens to that.
Might be useful as a dog kennel, but I respect my dog far too much to put her in one, she'd never forgive me.
Why don't cars look like proper cars any more? (Mutters grumpy inanities, takes another San Miguel from fridge and goes outside to finish T-Cutting 1969 Mustang, a proper car if ever there was).
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Don't agree with that, the Kia Picanto is fine for a little car (i've driven several), does what it says on the tin. Built for the undemanding, Still a '69 Mustang V8 is fine for it's own reasons too. Only Mustang i've driven was a '96 4.6 V8 hire car in the U.S. That was fine too I have to say!
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Growler, you have Myopia caused by too many cold beers, ogling too many scantily clad youg ladies, and inhaling too much T-Cut/Cellulose vapours. Oh and old age.
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Wah haaaa, there you Guys go again talking about beer, ladies, next it will be fry ups, I'm going outside to talk to my Chinese drilling crew, they will be talking about the same subjects but at least I can't understand them.
Ridiculus cars - if you can call it a car Sinclair C5
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Suzuki X-90. Why????
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The Smart. Eight grand is a lot to pay for a Scalextric car.
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Hummer, when used to go to a Nottingham shopping centre - couldn't get into normal parking space, reversed into two disabled spaces, driver obviously couldn't judge where rear was so it stuck out 6 ft into "road" causing hold-up. Woman and 2 teeage boys jumped out and ran into a sports shop while a disabled driver had to go elsewhere. Smart car (see above) would be more appropriate!!
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Yeh Phil i quite agree with u there! They are just too big for roads & the car parks in the U.K!!!
How about the new BMW X3? i mean our friend Jeremy Clarkson tried it off road & it was absolutely useless!!
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Its not what you drive, its how you drive it! :-)
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Seconded - if you want a 2 person soft-roader get a trials bike.
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Beer, ladies, oh yes and a good grease-up in the morning just to make sure the cholesterol level stays up (I love to be berated by my Doctor Elizabeth Gomez at my 3-monthly checkup, she does discipline so well). ;+)
Yes China can be hard work especially if too much "gambai" in the evenings.
In seriousness I am sure the Kia is an entirely competent car, it just looks so awful, and stuck in the traffic today I was thinking you can hardly tell any car from another any more. Bland, boring.
Moddies - should we have a Grumpy Old Git thread?
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Moddies - should we have a Grumpy Old Git thread?
Seconded, we need a place where we can say what we think without these youngsters getting in their oar.
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May I nominate the Kia Picanto? Aside from having one of the currently fashionably stupid and meaningless names dreamed up by marketing pimples over expense account lunches
Actually, Picanto isn't as meaningless as some names; I expect it's derived from piquant (picante in Spanish or piccante in Italian), meaning sharp, tart or s p i c y.
(the Sweary Thing didn't like that last word...)
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My vote goes for the Nissan Almera (SORRY, HJ! I know they advertise....)
Our company has a deal with a major car hire mob, and we always get these spineless, characterless hounds when we go anywhere on business.
Yeah, sure, they have electric windows, aircon and a CD player, but the cheesy little 1.6 can't get anywhere without you revving the bejesus out of it (try 4500 RPM) before shifting up, and if you are at altitude (ie Johannesburg) you'd better turn that aircon off if you want to maintain any type of speed in top gear (it is like dropping a 500lb gravestone in the boot when you turn the blighter on!)
Characterless, tinny, rubbish acceleration even at the coast.
I now ask the rental mob to DOWNGRADE me to a lesser group, where I might get a corrola or a Golf Mk1. (yes, we still have the latter here!)
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My vote goes for the Nissan Almera.
My wife has a 97 Almera, 1.4 so i can't think how you would cope with that! Maybe it has the stealth speed button (turn the aircon off). Ours is fine. Well it does the job.
My vote for "why do they make them" goes to small German premium hatchbacks. Come out from behind that curtain BMW Compact, Audi A3 stop hiding and Mercedes Coupe thingy stand up straight.
I don't get the idea behind these cars, unless it is to provide as least car as possible with a nice badge. Or maybe that's it......
So to answer my own question, they make them because people will spend twice as much as they need to on a small three door hatch because of the badge. And presumably the makers make huge money out of them.
Or and the Suzuki X90 - what was that for???
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"Kia Placenta"
Love it! Just as well deserved in the styling stakes as the Nissan Primeval!
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Maybe the handful of cars made in the 70's by the MOHS corporation are the most ridiculous - huge ungainly things made partly out of truck components. Two of the models were the Ostentatienne Opera Sedan and the Safari Car.
Many cars may be ridiculous in terms of everyday motoring, like a Lamborghini Countach, a Hummer or a Trabant but the MOHS cars were ridiculous even in terms of their intended purpose.
Look them up Google to see what I mean!!!
Cheers, Sofa Spud
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many new cars are truly awful looking things, my family have names for a couple ie nissan micra we call fugly a play on the advert do you speak micra, the new vectra the fridge freezer, i cant say some of the others on here like what we call the focus.but as an aside i am glad we dont all like the same cars as it would be boring if we all had black model t fords or beetles wouldn't it...cheers...keo oh and i recall upsetting a woman in our local petrol station her car was so ugly in my opinion i told her, the offending car a mazda 121 saloon probably a good enough car i just found it looked horrendous and it was purple...cheers...keo.
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Unusual possibly the kindest thing to say about MOHS productions
for Pic go tinyurl.com/6e7yf
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I don't see any reason to pick on the Picanto (pun!) out of the plethora of mobile hen-coops. My bete noir is the Smart, not because of the machine but because of one or two of the drivers, who seem to think they are better than, and should take precedence over, the rest of us.
I'm sure one of these things would get me to the chemist and things well enough; I choose to pay a bit more for Sonata because I like a bit of comfort and performance; others may have other uses for the money, or just not much of it and I'm sure a Picanto would do them well enough (see Car-by-Car).
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I'm driving my wife's smart until my new car arrives and the attitude from other motorists never ceases to amaze me. Pulling straight out at junctions, turning right across me at traffic lights, tailgating to the extreme of not being able to see the lights of the following vehicle (are you reading this Mr Volvo man from last night!).
The smart is capable of doing everything that 'normal' cars do except carry more than 2 people - this includes accelerating quickly to the speed limit and travelling down motorways in the outside lane. A £150 remap will enable it to go at speeds which can get you banned.
Because some drivers don't see the car as 'normal' they find it an afront that anyone should drive it like a 'normal' car!
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Surely the World's most ridiculous car occupies the opposite end of the scale to the Picanto.
The Bugatti Veyron gets my vote.
1000 bhp, 1,000,000 Euros and several years overdue.
Why?
Piech's ego, just like the Phaeton.
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The latest Rolls Royce! I've yet to see anything more insensitive and cack handed in all my life. Looks like someone has done a 'cut and shut' with a 1950s Dennis fire engine - or alternatively had a head on collision with a 1950s Dennis fire engine.....
I trust I haven't offended any RR owners on the forum (or indeed owners of Dennis fire engines.)
Graeme
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C5, I agree! When I first saw it, I wondered about the round and rectangular headlights on the same panel. The side elevation looks like the old Daimler D420 Limousine, but made ugly. The front definitely does look like the front of a bus. What were they thinking? Or what were they on?
The MOHS cars above are definitely worth a look. Staggering ugliness, a number of other forums with this thread have mentioned them.
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C5, I agree! When I first saw it, I wondered about the round and rectangular headlights on the same panel. The side elevation looks like the old Daimler D420 Limousine, but made ugly. The front definitely does look like the front of a bus. What were they thinking? Or what were they on? The MOHS cars above are definitely worth a look. Staggering ugliness, a number of other forums with this thread have mentioned them.
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Are you referring to the first or second incarnations?
Like many cars it looks better in some colours than others. Grey suits it, the wicked red and rainforest green don't, in my opinon.
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>>>>C5, I agree! When I first saw it, I wondered about the round and rectangular headlights on the same panel. The side elevation looks like the old Daimler D420 Limousine, but made ugly. The front definitely does look like the front of a bus.>>>
Presumably you mean the old Midland Red C5 motorway coach:
www.amrtm.org/4819e.JPG
Midland Red designed and built most of their buses in-house, including the engines!
Cheers, Sofa Spud
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Sadly, as I was once a confirmed Renault fan, it has to be the Avantime - all that bulk and only 2 doors, and looks that only its mother could love. I'm sure it eould have stood more of a chance if it had had four doors.
55 years ago there was a similar white elephant - anyone remember the A.C. 2-litre? Huge and hideous, with 2 suicide doors, and an engine that wouldn't pull the skin off a rice pudding.
Then they withdrew that and started trying to sell a thing called the Petite which had 3 wheels, 3 gears and, again, 2 suicide doors. Appropriate, as if any car company had a death wish it was A.C. I think they struggled on for years afterwards: the Cobra was I believe quite special but nothing muvh after that.
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As a Renault fan, (not myopic mind the Vel Satis is hideous) I have to say the Aventime is a stunning motor. This is a future classic.
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For once I agree with you having said that, after driving several Vel Satis's i'm a fan of that car too.
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Having had an Avantime for a week when they first came out i have to say i love them - not enough to part with my own money but in a few years when they are even cheaper i'd consider one as a bit of a toy.
most ridiculous car for me would be the suzuki X90 in the 2wd form - looks stupid, not practical, not quick, not even 4x4 - what is the point?
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Test drove an Avantime - it was a bit barge like. But I reckon it wil be a future classic as well. Problem will be finding parts for a car that is likely to be fragile and sold poorly.
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Espada III - well if you have a family and need a Lamborghini, what else do you drive?
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I've said it before on here but I love the Avantime. Nothing else on the road captures the Renault style. Brave, yes, brilliant, definitely.
The X90 does stand out as ridiculous, but I think not as stupid as all these Mitsubishi Warrior/Animal pickups that are becoming more popular with the Asda shopping/school run set.
-- Lee Having a Fabialous time.
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If actually had any money would difinitely buy an Avantime- think is fantastic looking.
Most ridiculous car- for my money Pontiac Aztec.
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May have to revise my original post.
This evening walking back from the pub I was confronted with a Toyota Echo. At first I thought it was a bread van, until I noticed it had seats in the back.
Then I found a Suzuki of some sort down my street which resembled a Tonka toy and was painted in a colour that in Australia would be described as a technicolor yawn. It had no name on it, probably because it looked so dreadful it was ashamed to advertise itself.
Now THERE's a reason for debadging.
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I want to nominate the Talbot Matra Rancho.
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Toyota Echo? is that the same one as they have in america which is basically a Yaris with a boot? And yes it is horrible!
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This evening walking back from the pub I was confronted with a Toyota Echo. At first I thought it was a bread van, until I noticed it had seats in the back.
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Ah that would be the Yaris Verso in the UK
To quote Toyota
The Yaris Verso represents a remarkable new concept that draws on highly original thinking in design and clever new advances in engineering. It combines interior space comparable to a Multi Purpose Vehicle (MPV) in an aerodynamic body shape that's no longer than a small family car.
And you call it a bread van. Some photos to remind you.
cars.hs.ru/obzors_yaris_verso.html
tinyurl.com/56bwl
For those not familiar with a Yaris with a boot
tinyurl.com/4ex3m
tinyurl.com/5w24w
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For those not familiar with a Yaris with a boot tinyurl.com/4ex3m tinyurl.com/5w24w
No, no, make it stop! What an ugly car!
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Another vote for the X90, I think, as it did nothing at all well.
Other markets get booted versions of the Polo, Corsa, Fiesta and best of all, the Clio...
However I'm not sure what Growler saw as the Echo/Yaris isn't sold in the Philippines, or at least it's not on Toyota's website there. However they do have the Toyota Echo Verso in China (thanks Google) so it was probably one of those: www.pcauto.com.cn/pingce/2003/10302/12311.html
Hideous, but quite practical and Growler, popular OAP transport over here...
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.Other markets get booted versions of the Corsa, Fiesta
Correct.. India and no doubt other markets too gets a booted Fiesta known as the Ford Ikon and Brazil gets a booted Corsa which is known as the Chevrolet Classic.
Incidentally the name Ikon was the original choice name for the Focus in 1998 but named was leaked to press so Ford chose Focus instead.
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The Yaris is so popular that it will not be replaced when the Yaris is changed next year.
Personally i think they're horrible little things!
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However I'm not sure what Growler saw as the Echo/Yaris isn't sold in the Philippines, pingce/2003/10302/12311.html Hideous, but quite practical and Growler, popular OAP transport over here...
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I could not find any photos of the Yaris Verso rear quarter view on any Toyota site or any other static site. I wonder why as it is after all the estate version?
Growler.
If you really do want to see this view then pop left to Auto Traders site and do a national search. Select a vehicle for sale with multi-photos and you will then never forget the styling.
Sorry! I forgot to say "Do not drink and search at the same time" or you might spray you San Miguel.
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LOL Mr Henry thanks for the thoughts but I think I'll spare myself the ordeal and dig out my Mustang books and send the housemaid out for another crate of San Mig to replace what I spilt.
I am not quite an OAP but even if I was I would not want to ride around in a Tonka toy. The automotive equivalent of a Zimmer frame.
As for being hideous and practical I would always go for beautiful and impractical.... ;+) Just saw a beautiful Austin-Healey 3000 ragtop with a stunning red and cream paint job. Now that is a CAR. C'mon, you know I'm right..... ;+)
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I was suprised how "sorted" the booted clio looked!
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Most ridiculous car - ever or in current production?
Ever, I would have to say the rear engined Skoda. OK so they were rugged but hideously ugly!
In current production - Having had to drive one, a Ki Rio automatic. SWMBO had one when her Nissan Almera was in for repairs (Ian in CT) you comments were noted ;)) That thing was truely awful to drive! Every time you shut the door you were frightened something would fall off like a wing or something! When it kicked down I thought someone had rear ended it!
Horrible, Horrible - yuk. We were just plesed to get the Nissan back.
H
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Saw it last night. Well not really a ridiculous car but just your average household cooking type 4WD.
The Ford Everest Ascent.
Maybe the marketeers wanted call it the Sherpa Tenzing but possibly that venerable gentleman had copyrighted it.
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Pursuing the family history trail on one occasion, and on arriving at the house of a newly-discovered distant cousin, I was mortified to note that he had a Reliant Robin in his drive. SWMBO was not with me on this visit but I did have to account later for the brown paper bag with eyeholes. ;o)
Oz (as was)
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Surely you mean a Robin Reliant? ;+D
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Surely you mean a Robin Reliant? ;+D
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Watch it, Growler...
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"Pursuing the family history trail on one occasion"
Years ago I was visitng a distant relly in the depths of East London. They had a brand new XR3i outside. The fire brigade were just putting it out after it had been dumped and torched.
Jeez a freshly burned car smells!
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AMC Pacer
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Saw a BMW 645 convertible this morning on the way to work. Why anyon would pay serious money for this mis-shapen lump is quite beyond me. A quick look at the dashboard reminded me of a FIAT Brava I hired some years ago - styled by the blind.
Mark
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