New Year is a time for predictions. So here is my guess at the top threads we will see in 2004; with some typical posts.
S**** C****** (yes, that\'s \"Safety Cameras\", which is on the swear filter for the simple reason that they are burger all to do with safety and everything to do with revenue - ND)
The police should spend less time trying to catch burglars - after all they have to pay for their drug habit and rarely hurt people(the burglars that is) They should concentrate on speeding motorists who are responsible for thousands of casualties!
Top Gear
Jeremy Clarkson and his dwarf accomplice should not spend so much time on mundane everyday cars. What we want is them showing off by demonstrating 4 wheel drifts in real supercars. That is far more relevant for the average motorist.
Optimax
I travel the same journey each week. When using Optimax it takes 1.5 tankfulls. Using Supermarket fuel I do the same journey on less than a tankfull, my acceleration is much better, the car is much quieter and I know the the supermarket additives will produce cleaner emissions.
However I do take heed of HJ\'s advice and I buy all my groceries from the local Shell garage.
Mobile Phones
I propose an amendment to the law. Hand held mobile phones should be legal if you are driving a 4 x 4 fitted with bull bars. After all in one of these you are not likely to hurt yourself if you hit a stupid pensioner who doesn\'t know how to use pedestrian crossings.
Moderating Policy
(From Mark RBLS) Thank you for your constructive criticisms of Backroom moderating policy. My fellow moderators and I have carefully studied the points you make and now appreciate the flaws in the \'small print\'. As you say we are all \"Men of the World\" and we should be more tolerant of profanity and swearing. Likewise with regard to \"free speech\" we now share your confidence that multi-national corporations will not sue us regardless of any slanderous comments we allow in the Backroom.
We will contact you by email when we lift your suspension from the site - but we are rather busy just now.
Any More?
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BMW drivers should be allowed to use any lane they choose on Motorway not just the outside lane.
People should recognise the new age Beemers for what they are - works of art not ugly at all.
Other marque owners should realise that indicators are just what they say they are a mere indication of the driection an average BMW driver may consider going so why use them at all ?
(Fireball that's another joke btw)
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I have a joke about BMW driver`s when I find I will post.Good for a laugh.
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I predict that HJ's hat will not leave his head.
A safe bet that one.
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"BMW drivers should be allowed to use any lane.."
Only fair, as they own the roads.. :-)
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Illegitimi non carborundum!
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January: Ford announces that throughout the whole year, new cars will be supplied with a free sandwich, called DuraLunch
February: Ford launches a sponsorship scheme for disabled drivers, to be called DurAble
March: Ford fits all of-road vehicles with an emergency food supply, called DuRation
April: Ford sponsors a new privatised prison, to be called DuraCell
May: The Govt confirms that the new online court for motoring offences is to be sponsored by Ford, and called DuriesOuT
June: Ford hastily cancels plans to supply a free children's portable loo with family cars, after managers discover that the product name was chosen by the team responsible for marketing the company's 5-speed automatic transmission ...
July: Ford renames its components and accessories to remove all traces of the "Dura" prefix
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"May: The Govt confirms that the new online court for motoring offences is to be sponsored by Ford, and called DuriesOuT"
Sorry but they can't do that (They have no DURAstiction)
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June:
Ford announces a new sponsorship deal for its WRC rally team by healthcare product manufacturers SSL-International.
Team Durex
Bit obvious sorry!
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July:
Ford take on a "british airways" idea to paint all there car a different style, and have no car identical.
August:
Ford realize why BA stoped this as it was losing them money
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